As If We'd Just Gone To Buy Milk
by sunflowerb
Summary: Life Resumes, sorta. Post KH2 oneshots and drabbles about life back on the islands. Humor,friendship, with implied sokai 26. Final Chapter: They sit there and laugh as if nothing has changed, because everything has changed.
1. Whipped

**A/N: At the time I am typing this author note, it has been a good two years since I first began this epic collection of drabbles and oneshots exploring what normal life would be like for the trio after spending so long being gone and living lives that were anything but normal (except for Kairi, although spending a year unable to remember the name of your best friend can't be called usual). Because after what they have been living, they can't really go back to living their lives as if they had just gone to buy milk. Even the normal things would be slightly different.**

**Please note that for the most part, there is no continuity between these oneshots. Every now and then there will be a chapter that harkens back to another, but this is not meant to be continuous from one chapter to the next. Keep that in mind. So feel free to skip to the most recent chapter and go backwards, as the writing gets better as time passes and the more recent stuff is therefore going to be of better quality.**

A/N(more specific to this oneshot): humor, implied SoKai.

Disclaimer: Note that your address bar should say fanfiction . net. Not "game scripts . net" If there is even such a site.

_Whipped_

Riku sighed as he watched the sun slowly sink below the horizon.

He mildly wondered where Sora and Kairi were. He hadn't seen either of them all day. Riku smirked. The two love birds had probably spent the day catching up. He shifted his position so that his back was resting against the curved trunk of the paopu tree. He sighed, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the tree. How he'd missed this.

He opened his eyes when he heard footsteps, and saw Sora making his way over to the tree.

"Hey Riku," Sora said, as he vaulted over the trunk and leaned up against it.

"Hey Sora. I haven't seen you all day. Where've you been?"

"I went shopping with Kairi," Riku raised his eyebrows.

"Shopping? She got you whipped already?"

Sora glared. "I'm not whipped! I needed new clothes! I've outgrown everything! And you know Kairi, she's a girl, the second I mentioned shopping, she just _had _to tag along!"

Riku laughed. "Whatever. But still, I can't imagine you spending a whole day shopping."

Sora rolled his eyes. "_I_ didn't. _She _did." He said exasperatedly. "I was done in about half an hour. But Kairi…." Sora huffed and rolled his eyes.

"She must have bought at least fifteen different outfits, and seven pairs of shoes!" Sora threw his hands up in the air.

"Why do girls need so many pairs of shoes?" He exclaimed.

"Beats me." Riku shook his head as Sora continued his rant.

"How can any one girl spend 400 munny in one day?! On clothes?!"

Riku frowned. "She couldn't have spent _that _much, come on."

"Oh, no, she spent that much," Sora rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time. "I know. I paid."

Riku laughed. "You bought her clothes?" He taunted.

Sora scowled. "I didn't buy everything for her!" He shouted. "I just lent her the munny! She forgot hers! She's gonna pay me back!"

"You lent her 400 munny?" Riku said, raising his eyebrows.

Sora shrugged. "She gave me that face…."

Riku smirked.

"Whipped."


	2. Popular

A/N: Humor/General, implied SoKai.

Disclaimer: --Is that word not enough?

_Popular_

Their escapades of the last two years were supposed to stay a total and complete secret. So, naturally, everyone knew.

And he, Sora, and Kairi, had never been more popular.

Sure, Riku was used to being surrounded by girls; they had always flocked around him, but they did so now more than ever.

Sora apparently had gotten hotter in the female population's eyes as well. They stared dreamy eyed as he walked down the school hallways with an arm draped protectively around Kairi's shoulders.

It's a known fact that they're together. The news spread like wild fire, since everyone had been waiting for them to get together since Kairi washed up on their island.

Of course, that didn't stop girls from being jealous. Some of them watch Kairi with scorn, as if she isn't, and could never be, good enough for Sora.

Most of them just look at her with envy. As if they would give anything to be in her place.

Riku could only laugh. He had a fan club. They would swarm him, begging him to tell them about his adventures. (Lucky for him, no one knew that he had fallen to the darkness.)

As Kairi had informed them both, Riku and Sora had done a lot of growing, and both of them had gotten a lot hotter in the past year. (They had blushed furiously at this.)

Apparently, to girls, Riku was "mysterious, and dangerous" and "kinda got that bad boy vibe." Hey, those were Kairi's words, not his.

Sora, on the other hand, had the whole "handsome, gallant knight in shining armor thing going on." Once again, Kairi's words. That comment had just about killed Sora.

Kairi, on the other hand, was only admired from afar. All Sora had to do to warn off competition was "accidentally" summon the keyblade during lunch.

Needless to say it had also increased Sora's popularity.


	3. Torture

A/N:Thanks for the reviews, on this story, and on Something Real. Reviews would by very much appreciated, because it is my birthday, and I would like reviews for my birthday. Thank yoooouuu.

A/N2: This was inspired by a fan comic involving Sora walking into a tree. You will probably understand _why_ Sora ran into a tree, and why this incident inspired this fanfic, after you read it. Remember, keyblade masters or not, they are still teenage boys.

Disclaimer: I'm a teenager. I don't own _anything_.

_Torture_

Sora and Riku strolled nonchalantly down the beach, enjoying the warm sunny day. Their stroll was interrupted, however, by the musical laughter drifting up from the water's edge.

The two boys stopped to watch Kairi and Selphie splashing about in the shallows. But what was really capturing their attention was Kairi's attire. Or rather, lack thereof.

"Since when does Kairi wear bikinis?" Riku wondered out loud.

"You're complaining?" Sora asked.

Riku grinned. "Nope."

They continued to watch the girls splashing in the ocean.

"Sora! Riku!" Kairi yelled, waving as she noticed her two friends on the beach.

"Hey boys! Why don't you come join us?" Selphie shouted, jumping up and down.

"Uh, uh," The boys spluttered for a moment, trying to shift their brains back in to gear.

"Yeah, maybe, sure,"

"Okay!" Kairi shouted back, before she and Selphie broke into a fit of giggles.

Sora and Riku continued to stare for a moment.

"She's evil." Riku said at last, his eyes still glued to Kairi's pink bikini.

"And brilliant." He added.

Sora didn't even look at Riku as he answered.

"What do you mean?"

"It's like she's simultaneously punishing us and thanking us." Riku stated.

"What do you mean?" Sora repeated.

"Well, Riku began, "She's in a _bikini_. She's thanking us for finally coming home. But it's like she's punishing us for being gone for so long by taunting us like this. It's like she's got a huge 'look, but don't touch' sign hanging over her head. She's trying to torture us."

"Hmm," Sora grunted. "I guess you're right."

Kairi suddenly squealed as Selphie untied the neck straps of her halter top, and Kairi just managed to catch her top before it revealed anything.

Sora nodded. "They're evil."

---------

"Selphie!" Kairi squealed, as she retied her bathing suit straps.

Kairi glanced over at Sora and Riku, both of whom were still standing on the beach, gawking at her.

She and Selphie rolled their eyes and started giggling again.

"_Boys_!"

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A/N: Let us not forget, Keyblade masters or not, they are still teenage boys. The review button is feeling neglected. Please give it some love.


	4. Just a Favor

A/N: This one sort of ties in with _Whipped._ Humor, hinted SoKai.

Yay, two updates in one day! In honor of it being my birthday. So, review, please.

Disclaimer: No, I don't own Kingdom Hearts. Why? Would you like to give me the rights? I'll gladly except.

_Just a Favor_

Sora tapped his foot impatiently and idly fiddeled with the handles of his shopping bag as the cashier rang up Kairi's purchases.

"That'll be 50 munny." The cashier told her. Kairi dug threw her purse, searching for her wallet.

She dug for about a minute, before taking out her cell phone, a tube of lipgloss, a pack of gum, sunglasses, another tube of lipgloss, a tube of mascara, a pen, a stack of sticky notes, and a box of tictacs, and laying it all on the counter.

She opened her mouth to say something, closed it, then went back to rumanging through her purse. Sora couldn't help but wonder what else that girl could possibly have in her purse. Finally, Kairi sighed, and stopped her frantic searching.

"Did you forget your munny?" Sora asked, knowing full well how redundant his question must sound.

She nodded.

The cashier sighed and looked at Sora.

Kairi turned her eyes to Sora and smiled at him sheepishly.

"No, no, no, no, n-no, no, No." Sora stated quickly.

Kairi looked at him with that pleading smile.

"Kairi, no! I'm not gonna,…Kai, no, come on…I-no! No…I said no!"

"….."

Sora growled as he reluctantly slapped 50 munny on the counter.

_Darn cuteness._

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

A/N: 400 munny may seem alot, but I was just thinking about how much stuff usually costs in the game. Plus, I've spent 400 bucks in one day before. Well, my dad spent 400 bucks on me in one day. We are women, watch us get our way!

The whole purpose of that lovely review button is so it can be clicked. Won't you help the poor little review button fulfill its life purpose?


	5. Taken and Gossip

A/N: A double feature, since they are both so short. First one is the only real angsty story so far (and possibly the only one to come) with implied onesided RikuKairi, and the second is humor, with implied Sokai.

Disclaimer: I wish.

_Taken_

Riku was Mr. Popular. Girls worshipped him. They'd do anything to be with him. They'd kill to be his girlfriend.

He could have any girl he wanted.

Well, almost any girl.

He could have any girl _except _the one he wanted.

---------------------------

_Guy Gossip_

Riku, Tidus, and Wakka watched as Sora followed Kairi toward the front doors of the school building, stumbling under the weight of all of his books, and hers.

Tidus shook his head at the two lovebirds. "He's hopeless. Lost, captured by the dark side."

Wakka looked at Riku.

"Whipped?"

"Totally."

---------------------------------------------------

A/N: Guy Gossip is inspired by and episode of Boy Meets World. The one where Eric dates that girl Desiree.


	6. Quack

EDIT: Thanks to SimplySarah1221, for pointing out that I spelled "Professor" wrong, because that reminded me that I didn't use spell check. See, I wrote this last week, and I didn't type it on Word, I typed it on this site, which I don't usually do. I was going to copy and paste onto Word for the spell check, but I didn't that day, and then I forgot. So, now I've fixed the spelling, and other mistakes, and stuff, so, this is now dedicated to SimplySarah1221, since the spelling wouldn't have gotten fixed yet otherwise.

A/N: Oh my goodness, thanks ever so much to all the wonderful reviews on _Luck_. This wonderful little oneshot just popped into my head yesterday. Also, I never have explained where I got the title _As if We'd Just Gone to Buy Milk_. You see, I'd hijacked the PS2 to my room, so my brother was in there playing KH2, and my stepbrother was looking through the guidebook for something to draw. I was drawing too. You see, my brothers and I have enough love and respect for the KH world to make fun of it, without really thinking the game is dumb. Hunter (my step bro) started joking around about what it would be like when Sora got home. "It's like, yeah, I just went out to get some milk. Sorry, traffic was terrible. I'm afraid the milk went bad on the way here, though." and so on and so forth. It may not seem funny, but you just kinda had to be there.

Disclaimer: I only own Professor Alena Mirrow, and she isn't very fun to own.

_Quack_

Professor Alena Mirrow had been teaching for 46 years. Yes, 46. Her pupils considered her ancient. As had their parents when she'd taught them.

But never had a student reacted in such a way to the topic of animal psychology.

It was a topic she brought up ever year to her biology class, just before they started a short study on the scientific names and groupings of living creatures.

"So, veterinary scientists on our island have recently, well, twenty years ago, decided to do a new study on domestic and local animal psychology. Studies like this had been done but-Kari, are you listening?" The redhead looked up from her notebook.

"Um, yes, ma'am. And, its Kairi." she said quickly.

Professor Mirrow raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really, you looked awfully busy with that drawing of yours."

Kairi blushed. "I can focus better if I'm doodling."

Mirrow sighed, and continued. "Fine. Anyway, they wanted to see how the psychology of certain animals differs from humans, and also determine how to better care for domesticated animals." Professor Mirrow could tell she was boring her students. Apparently this wasn't interesting.

"Obviously, the study was extensive and long. Animals can't just talk, and tell us how they feel. But just imagine, if you will, what an animal would say if it could talk."

She paused, she had noticed the look passed between two of her students: the redhead, whose name Professor Mirrow could _never_ remember, and the spiky haired boy who was always staring at her. They swapped a glance, and broke out in silent giggles. The girl, Kara, was that it? looked down at her notebook, letting her hair fall down to hide her smile. The boy, she thought his name was...Sora, was biting his lip and trying very hard to suppress a smile.

Their shoulders were shaking in the attempt to keep the laughter silent.

Professor Mirrow didn't know what to think. She had never had a student react like this to this topic. Never. Most of the time her students were very ho-hum about the matter, having done all the thinking about the idea of talking animals that they could ever want to do by this point in their lives. They found the idea cliché, and boring, but not funny.

Mirrow honestly couldn't see what was so humorous. And these two students weren't the kind of immature idiots that would laugh at anything. On the contrary, they were the most mature students in their grade.

She cleared her throat. "Sora...uh, Kira, something you find amusing?" The two teenagers looked up at her.

"Nope, nothing," Sora managed to say, his voice shaking slightly with the laughter he was trying to conceal. But he caught Kairi's eyes and they both sniggered again.

"Humph." Professor Mirrow eyed them both, before going on with her lecture. "Wouldn't it be interesting to find out first hand how pollution is affecting local wildlife? Factory water pollution, for example. What would the reply be if you asked the opinion of say, a duck, on the..."

And that was it.

The two previously sniggering students exploded into peals of uncontrollable laughter. Whatever they found so funny, they were finding it positively _hysterical_. Whatever the joke was, Mirrow didn't get it. Apparently no one else did either. All of the other students were staring like their two classmates had just sprouted extra heads.

"What is so funny!?" The teacher shouted, staring at the tickled teens, incredulous.

The boy was the first to calm down enough to speak. "Well," he began, the laughter still evident in his voice, "I s-suppose if I wa-ha-as t-to talk to a d-d-duck. I suppose he might say that darkness was a, a much greater t-threat than, than pollution." The girl beside him began howling afresh at this statement, as Sora broke out into laughter with her.

"A-and," his female companion choked out, "after that, he, he could teach you magic!" The boy laughed even harder at this.

"Wa, wait. I'd love to, to ask a mouse, how he'd like t-to save the universe!" He puffed out, holding his sides, and shaking with laughter.

"Maybe ask the dog what he's got against weapons!" Kairi squealed, barely able to talk.

"Discuss government with a lion monarch!" Sora gasped, laughter interrupting every other word.

Professor Mirrow stared. Where on earth were they getting this stuff? And why was it _that _funny?

The laughter died down enough for one last sentence from Sora. "And after that, we could discuss interstellar travel with a couple of chipmunks!" And they were gone, laughing so hard that neither could muster the breath to speak anymore. They were both doubled over, their eyes watering, and their whole bodies shaking with the uncontrollable laughter.

Nearby students were slowly scooting their desks away. Clearly, they were as confused as their teacher.

Professor Mirrow had been teaching for 46 years. She had taught every grade, every subject. She had never done, or wanted to do anything else. She had always been a teacher, and had enjoyed every minute of it. As she watched the howls of the two pupils before her, she began to think.

Maybe it was time to retire.

End

A/N:Yeah, this just popped into my head yesterday. I assume Sora and Kairi would be tenth graders (in the USA school system.) Most people in tenth grade are either 15 or 16, and I was 15 in tenth grade, so that's where I decided to put them. Also, my school has biology in 9th grade, but we're a private school, and I think I heard that public schools (in our area, at least) have biology in 10th grade.

Read and Review, even if it's to say you hate it.


	7. Fandom

A/N: Just something that popped into my brain. Humor, no real pairings, but plenty of antipairings... Raised the rating just in case for this one. No flames, _please._ It's a waste of time and energy, and I'm so stubborn it won't make much of a difference. The most that you will accomplish by flaming me is making me laugh because someone actually wasted their time telling me how much they hate me, or whatever.

* * *

_Fandom_

Try as he might, Riku could not _begin _to fathom what made so many of those crazy yaoi fangirls think he was so gay that he couldn't even park straight. None of them had ever thought he was in love with Sora _before _all the crazyness with the keyblades.

That was the case, apparently. Forget that Sora had been his best friend his whole life. Ignore the last 10 years they had spent fighting over Kairi. Forget that Riku could never in a million years act gay if he wanted to. To those girls, they were secret lovers, and that was that.

Sora, at least, had it a little easier. He had Kairi to tell those girls just how straight Sora really was. Which, incidentally, sparked quite a few other rumors. Exactly _what _Kairi had told those nutcases, Riku didn't want to know, but she'd apparently let loose a few little white lies that had escalated into some _major _reputation ruiners for Kairi. She was still working on cleaning that mess up, actually.

Riku hated to admit that he was glad that she, as well as himself and their spiky haired friend, had a reputation that was simultaneously falling apart and coming back together in the weirdest of ways.

He still wondered why these girls singled him out. Why on earth did they think he was in love with Sora? What made them think he was gay? Was it his long hair? According to Kairi, there was no reason whatsoever. They just liked the idea, or something like that.

Riku didn't care that much. His friends (and his many admirers) knew that those girls were all crazy.

However, today, he was mad. Because today was the first of his week's worth of detentions. Detentions he'd somehow gotten because the huge catfight during lunch between the yaoi fangirls and the "We heart Riku Forever Fanclub" had been over him.

* * *

A/N:Please, no flames. This just popped into my head. It just kinda grew from the line about not being able to park straight. The Sora Riku yaoi fandom just kills me. Actually, the yaoi fandom in general just bugs the heck outta me. Please, review, unless you are reviewing just to flame, in which case, I really don't want to hear it. Waste of time, waste of precious fossil fuels, waste of internet connection, waste of my inbox space.

-Megan P/SunflowerB, as in B NICE


	8. Drive Me Crazy

I LIVE! So, yay! Two in one day! It's to make up for not updating in a while. (which isn't nearly as long of a while as the time between updates of my other stories) Anyway, this one is for Mrfipp, for giving me the idea. See, I didn't forget about you. Sorry it took so long, but I had a few other oneshots already written and typed, and I wanted to get those up first, then other inspiration hit, and I had to get those out of the way before I got to this. But, here it is.

Anyway, thanks for all the reviews so far! They make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Also, the car in the story is a Beetle because 's what I have and therefore know most about; and B. they really are super safe which fits in with the plot. You'll understand afterwards.

Disclaimer: If only, if only, my heart cries, if only.

_Drive Me Crazy_

"…and once you've figured that out, then you just finish up the graph, and you're done. Got it?" Kairi finished, looking up from her Algebra book at Sora.

Sora looked from Kairi, to his book, to her graph, to Kairi, to his graph, to Kairi, to her book, to her paper, back to his book and then to Kairi.

He blinked.

"You didn't understand a _word _I just said, did you?" she stated bluntly.

Sora threw up his hands in frustration.

"I'm trying here, Kairi! I really am! It's just, you're not making any sense! Explain that first part again," he whined.

Kairi groaned. "Sora," she sat back on his couch, pushing away the algebra book and math papers, and rubbing her temples, "we've been at this for three hours! How on this world or any other do you expect to EVER get caught up? You've got a year's worth of schoolwork to catch up on! You're just lucky they didn't hold you back!"

Sora was about to reply that it wasn't exactly his fault that he'd missed a whole year of school, and that, Keybearers that they were, in all likelihood he, Kairi, and Riku would never have the chance to go to college, and would be lucky to finish high school, but he was interrupted by a loud _honk! _

Sora jumped so bad he fell off the couch, and the keyblade flashed to life in his hand. He sat up, dismissed the keyblade, and looked to Kairi, who was staring out the living room window at the driveway of Sora's house. Sora pulled himself back onto the couch, and glanced outside. There, in his driveway, was a black Volkswagen beetle, and who should be leaning up against it, but his best friend.

Sora gaped.

"Riku's got a car?" Kairi asked, incredulous.

"Riku's got his _license_?" Sora exclaimed, his expression the quintessence of disbelief.

They looked at each other.

"How did _that_ happen?" Kairi wondered.

Sora nodded in agreement.

That ship in the World That Never Was was one thing, but when it came to operating automobiles, well, Riku should probably just walk. They heard another loud _honk_, and took that to mean that Riku wanted them out there _now._

They exchanged worried glances.

"I've heard those things are supposed to be really, really, safe," Kairi muttered.

Sora thought for a moment. Riku's driving, or Algebra.

He could risk his life, or risk his sanity.

Sora was used to risking his life.

KH

"Hey!" Riku greeted as he watched Sora walk out his front door. But as he spotted Kairi, he smirked at Sora, who sent him a death glare.

"What are you two up to?" he asked, ignoring the murderous look Sora was giving him.

Kairi rolled her eyes. "I was _trying _to teach Sora algebra."

Sora grinned sheepishly at her.

"So," Kairi mused, frowning slightly at Riku's car. "You…actually got your license." She attempted to look excited. "That's…good."

Sora raised an eyebrow. "You didn't threaten the instructor, did you?"

Riku glared. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Sora held up his hands in defense. "Nothing, nothing. Just…nothing."

"Oookay," Riku scrutinized his friends' smiles. "Anyway, why don't we drive down to the market? I heard there was something going on down there today."

Kairi chuckled nervously. "Or, y'know, we could just walk. The market is really close, and with gas priced rising…"

Riku sighed. "C'mon! I have a new ride to show off!" he whined.

With a glance at each other, Sora and Kairi finally agreed. As Riku turned to ramble about the various features of his new car, Sora and Kairi had a swift and silent rock, paper, scissors battle for the airbags, I mean, front seat. Kairi won, and Sora decided, as he climbed into the back, that perhaps it was best that Kairi got the safer seat.

As Sora took his seat in the back, Riku leaned back and muttered, "You know, I could just convince Kairi to sit back there, and you two could have the back seat all to yourselves…"

Sora chuckled mischievously, before muttering darkly to Riku, "And I can tell your mom 'bout that magazine under your mattress."

Riku's smirk left his face faster than Demyx faced with the prospect of fighting.

KH

Despite Sora and Kairi's qualms about Riku's driving, the trip to the market was a relatively uneventful one. Sure, Riku almost ran over a dog, and ran a stop sign, but other than that, there was minimal threat to their lives. After arriving at the market, they discovered that the thing going on there was a festival for preschool and daycare kids. So, deciding that they were a bit too old for rock songs about the alphabet, they elected to go back to Sora's house.

The trip back to Sora's house was about as uneventful as the trip there. About twenty feet from Sora's driveway, Riku turned to Sora.

"See, I can-"

"Uh, Riku-"

"drive! You didn't-"

_**Crunch.**_

As the car came to a sudden stop, Riku didn't bother to turn around. He closed his eyes, as he asked, "What did I hit?"

"Mrs. Kornrumple's mailbox," Kairi stated matter-of-factly. Indeed, Riku had completely leveled the brick mailbox.

"Hey Riku," Sora pondered, a memory nagging at the back of his mind, "Isn't she the lady whose lawn gnomes we filled with fireworks when we were eleven?"

"You _what?_" Kairi asked, simultaneously amazed her friends had done something that stupid without her knowledge, and hurt that she hadn't been included in that particular venture.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY MAILBOX?!" At that shriek, Riku and Sora winced.

"Yup," Riku nodded. "That was her."

As Sora recalled how much trouble they'd been in for blowing up the woman's lawn gnomes, he became very happy that this time, he could _honestly _say that had been Riku's fault.

END

A/N: So, I hope everyone liked this one. "And I can tell your mom 'bout that magazine under your matress." I'm quite tickled with that line, just so's ya know. Mrfipp, you said you had other ideas for me, I think? I've never had a request to reject or accept before, so i'll gladly listen. Anyway, I won't tell y'all what my original idea for what was going on at the market was, but I will say that I decided at the last minute that it might be better to take it out.

The thought of Riku and Sora being middle school pyromaniacs is based off of my brother, although he had yet to actually blow anything up. Although he did set a stick on fire on our stovetop...

R&R


	9. Paranoia

**A/N: Hooray! Thanks for all the reviews! 21 and counting! I'm so thankful to all my wonderful reviewers! 1079 hits and counting! YOU GUYS ROCK!**

**So, to actually reply to some of my reviewers, you amazing people, you.**

**PasNRaine-I suppose Sora would be a good driver, since he's had to pilot the gummi ship so much. Riku, on the other hand, has had the dark corridors to get around in. But, thank you!**

**a-black-rose-I feel so honored! There are a lot of great Fanfics in this section, and I'm thrilled to death that you so liked mine!**

**YinYangWhiteTiger-Your suggestion just triggered an awesome idea in the depths of the insanity of my brain. I won't give too much away now, but thanks ever so much! At first I wasn't sure what to do with that, but a few minutes ago, I was re-reading what you suggested, and I was just struck with a great direction to take it. You are awesome, thanks for all the reviews!**

**MrFipp-Why is it that your second idea was the one that I liked so much? I mean, it's totally random, and kinda weird, and, and….hmm, totally like me. So, yeah, I rather liked it. I've never been able to spell squirrel either (thank you windows spell check). Thank you so much for the ideas and reviews!**

**SimplySarah1221-once again, thanks for mentioning a spelling mistake on Quack, because I otherwise wouldn't have gotten the spelling and grammar fixed.**

**Thanks also to C2-Chikaru, Russ Dog, Princesskairi3 (for the review and favorite), MeMoRy PrInCeSs, Nohime, Fallen Dragonfly, Angelgirl18647, Fireflyoflight457, for all your reviews, favorites, etc. You are all wonderful, sorry if I didn't reply individually, but I appreciate you all the same.**

**As several of you have mentioned, I should make the chapters longer, soooo, I made this one long. (1772 words not counting author's note)**

**So, since I've taken up enough space, on with the shoooooooooooow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**Disclaimer: Is this really necessary? We all know I don't.**

_Paranoia_

Sora knew it sounded crazy, but crazier things had happened. Why was it that people gaped in awe when he talked about fighting Xemnas in a world that wasn't ever even there, but they gave him funny looks when he muttered that that stupid squirrel was out to get him?

If that sounded incredulous, than you've read it correctly.

He knew everyone thought he was losing it, but Sora was certain that the squirrel was trying to kill him. After all, there were plenty of nutcases in the universe who wanted him out of the picture, so why did it seem so crazy that this squirrel was in on it?

"Because," as Riku so eloquently put it, "It's a stupid squirrel."

The whole ordeal had started on a Tuesday; Sora remembered Tuesday, because Kairi had a huge science test, and he had been anticipating this Tuesday, because after today, he would no longer have to listen to Kairi rant about the stupid test.

They were on their way to school, and Kairi, because of the aforementioned test, was muttering to herself as she frantically shuffled through her notes. Sora had long ago tuned her out, since anything he said would lead to Kairi lecturing him for not studying, even though _he _didn't have the test today. So, as much as he wanted to tell Kairi that she shouldn't have taken that extra science course, his love of life kept his mouth shut.

He had been fumbling with his tie when he sensed some strange movement from the corner his peripheral vision. He just noticed out of the corner of his eye the acorn, before it collided with his ear.

"OWWW!" he shouted, clapping a hand to his ear. He was surprised to find that the acorn had actually drawn blood. His outburst was enough to attract Kairi's attention, and she dropped her papers in surprise.

"Sora!" She hurried to his side and gently pried his hand away from his ear. "What happened?" she asked, examining the cut along Sora's earlobe.

"Acorn," Sora muttered distractedly, looking up at a nearby tree. It was a large tree on the edge of the path, but what captured his attention was a squirrel. It was an odd squirrel; reddish-brown with a distinct white stripe down its head and back, and one of its ears had been torn completely off. It was staring at him, something sinister in its eyes.

"An acorn?" Kairi asked, narrowing her eyebrows. "How could an acorn do that?" Even as she said it, she noticed the acorn in question lying on the ground beside Sora's shoe. She bent down and picked it up, noting that it was indeed a rather large acorn, with its end red with what she could only assume was Sora's blood. "Well," she began, standing up and showing Sora the acorn, "I guess you were really hit by an acorn."

"Hm." Sora only glanced at the acorn before looking back at the squirrel. It was holding another acorn. Sora tilted his head slightly in thought, but before he knew what had happened, the acorn had bounced off his nose.

"Ow!" he shouted again, as Kairi caught the acorn that had hit him. Sora stared at the squirrel.

"That's weird," Kairi commented casually. "I bet the weather lately is causing the acorns to drop off early,"

"The squirrel threw it." Sora stated, glaring at the creature.

Kairi raised an eyebrow. "The squirrel?" Sora pointed. She looked up at the tiny mammal, and then turned to roll her eyes at Sora. "Sora, it's a squirrel. Why would it throw an acorn at you?"

Sora continued to glare at the squirrel as he rubbed his nose. "I don't know, but it did! I'm telling you Kairi, that squirrel doesn't like me!"

"Sora…" Kairi simply rolled her eyes, and dragged Sora off to school.

But it didn't end there. The more Sora thought about it, the more it made sense that the squirrel was out to get him. After all, he had a _lot_ of enemies, who's to say they couldn't have made that stupid squirrel go after him?

* * *

The next day on the way to school, Riku had decided to accompany them (rather than driving) so he could see the furry woodland creature who had "felled the Incredible Sinking Sora." However, Riku hadn't been expecting there to be any murderous animal, so was therefore quite surprised when he heard a loud "OUCH!" from Sora. 

Sora gaped at the tree. It was definitely the same tree from yesterday, and definitely the same stupid one-eared squirrel. And it was most definitely an acorn that had just hit his shoulder. And even as he stared at the evil creature, it chucked _another _acorn at him.

"YOW!" Sora held a hand over his quickly swelling eye, as Kairi and Riku rushed to his aid.

"It's that squirrel again!" he shouted, and his friends followed his pointing finger to the squirrel.

"Sora," Kairi began, but Sora cut her off.

"No! I'm telling you! It's the stupid squirrel! The same stupid one-eared squirrel from yesterday! He's out to get me!" Sora yelped as another acorn hit his arm.

"Okay, that's it," he growled, summoning the keyblade and aiming it at the tree. But before Sora could begin his Blizzaga spell, the squirrel scampered out of sight among the branches, and Sora was subject to Kairi's rave about cruelty to animals.

* * *

The squirrel incident was not brought up again that day until Sora arrived home and was forced to explain to his mother that the reason for his bruised eye was that he'd been assaulted by a squirrel. 

"A squirrel?" his mother asked, giving him an is-this-the-best-you-can-come-up-with look.

Sora nodded, holding the ice pack over his bruised right eye. "Yes, the squirrel hates me."

"Uh-huh." She grunted, taking Neosporin and band-aids out of a cabinet. "So," she demanded, giving Sora the typical what-really-happened look, "Who was the fight with? Riku, as usual, I suppose?"

Sora gaped. "No! I wasn't fighting! The squirrel was throwing acorns at me! Ask Kairi or Riku, they were both there! The stupid thing hates me! Mom, I'm serious, the squirrel is out to get me!"

Now, Sora hadn't expected his mother to believe him, but after he persisted with the squirrel story, she actually called Kairi and Riku and asked if Sora had indeed been attacked by as squirrel. While neither could verify the squirrel, they could at least verify the acorn.

The day ended with everyone Sora really cared about thinking he needed mental help. His mother had actually mentioned therapy. Something about the traumatic events of the last two years messing with his mind.

* * *

The next day brought with it three more bruises from acorns. Perhaps the only thing worse than having a squirrel out to get him, was no one believing that a squirrel was out to get him. 

"Sora," Kairi stated, her hands on his shoulders, staring straight into his eyes, following the squirrel attack, "The squirrel. Is. Not. Out. To. Get. You. It's a _squirrel._"

Sora stared just as unyieldingly back. "Yes. It. Is. And why does it being a squirrel make any difference?!" This is the point Sora began to get hysterical. "We know a mouse who rules a world, a duck who knows magic, and a dog, thing who commands an army! We know chipmunks who run the gummi- Ha! Maybe that's it!" Sora turned and glared at the squirrel. "Chip and Dale sent you, didn't they! You're their cousin or something, aren't you!"

Kairi raised her eyebrows. "Sora, what are you-"

Sora ignored her and continued yelling. "They sent you to get back at me! I only wrecked the gummi ship once! Once! And it was only the second time I'd ever flown the stupid thing!"

"Okay, Sora, let's go." Riku, who had grown tired of the hysteria, ended up dragging Sora, ranting and raving, away from his animal arch enemy.

* * *

The following morning, Sora came prepared. The moment they came within acorn-throwing distance of the tree, Sora whipped out the keyblade and had it aimed at the tree. And, unsurprisingly, as they passed, the squirrel chucked another acorn. It was only with the reflexes of someone who'd saved the world twice over that Sora avoided the hit. 

"See!" he yelled. "It's done it again! The squirrel-"

"Is out to get you, we know," Riku had grown quite accustomed to this, and kept walking.

Kairi stopped. "That reminds me," She kneeled down and very carefully opened her bag.

"I think the reason that the squirrel is out to get you, is because it has nothing better to do than throw acorns." She said, pulling something out of her bag. Sora was amazed to see that the thing was-

"A squirrel!" Sora exclaimed, staring at the furry creature in Kairi's hands. It was, indeed a squirrel. It had clearly been sleeping, and now was stretching and preening its tail. Sora now realized why Kairi had been so careful with her bag that day.

"Her name's Emmy," she explained, gently running her fingers over the creature's head. "We found her in our backyard about a month or so ago. She was nearly dead, but you know my mother, she wanted to nurse the poor thing back to health. So, now that she's all better, I suppose it's time we put the sweet little thing back in the wild where it belongs."

Sora stared, slightly repulsed, because it was, after all, a squirrel, but at the same time, he couldn't help but think that it was kind of cute. More over, he found it positively adorable that Kairi had helped to save its life.

"I think that it might help Emmy get used to everything if she had a friend." Kairi carried Emmy to the tree where Sora's demonic squirrel resided and the petite mammal scampered up into the branches. It was interesting to watch the interaction as the two squirrels examined each other, before scampering away into the foliage.

"And maybe now you're squirrel will have better things to do than throw acorns at your head." Kairi remarked.

Sora, who might have thought the whole thing "cute" had he not hated that stupid one-eared squirrel so much, simply shrugged and continued on to school.

And as the next two weeks progressed, and Sora was no longer being pelted by acorns, he decided that the squirrel, who it had long ago been decided to be male, had found something better to do.

* * *

A/N: I hope you all like this one, because while i'm happy with the plot, i don't feel like it really flows. Anyway...yah. I really need to work on my other stories, but the plot bunnies won't leave me alooooone!!!!!!!!!! I've been really busy lately, what with school and everything, but I'm not in the musical this year (audition was a TRAINWRECK. bridge collapse, passenger train, wasn't pretty) but I'm still gonna be busy, so updates won't be as frequent, but I'm trying to keep them going. I don't know how long I'm going on this one, because there isn't really a story, so much as just a bunch of oneshots. 


	10. Fault

A/N: Behold, the long awaited update! I'm sick, so I've got a little time to work. Happy Halloween! Sorry I haven't got a themed something to give. This oneshot is alot longer than I anticipated. The original idea has been floating around in my head for the longest time. I mean, like, since before I thought of _Whipped._ However, it hasn't been until now that i've managed to figure out how to put it together in a decent way. But the scenario i've had for a long time. I actually had figured that I'd never actually post a story out of it because it was just such a vague and kind of corny idea at the time. But, I've managed to actually make it cute.

I've filed this story under Romance, and yet there has been a deficit of fluff. I present my endevor to fix that.

Sokai fluff with implied Roxine.

Disclaimer: After ten chapters, I think you get the point.

* * *

_Fault_

"For the millionth time, it's NOT a date!" Sora was really getting quite tired of telling people this.

First his mother, who had nearly laughed herself to the point of suffocation when he'd told her he was just going on a walk with Kairi; and then his _grandmother _who his disbelieving mother had felt the need to call and inform. Then of course Riku, who had made a professional sport out of teasing him about Kairi since they'd returned home, was having a field day with the information. And then there was Selphie, romantic that she was, who had cornered him to ask if it was true that he'd finally asked Kairi out on a date. After that, Tidus and Wakka had congratulated him about "you know what we mean, mon." And once they figured out that Sora truthfully did not know what they meant they came right out and asked about Kairi, to which Sora informed them that no, it was not a date.

Sora would gladly have gone through all of those awkward moments again if only to avoid this one. Now it was Kairi's father who he had to convince that it wasn't a date.

The man raised an eyebrow at Sora. Clearly he didn't believe him. Sora was at a loss. He'd always been on good terms with Kairi's adopted parents. They'd always liked him. They'd always considered him a 'nice young man' who, as Kairi had once told him back in the days when the thought of being in _love _had seemed repulsive to them, her parents hoped she might start dating once she got old enough to really like boys.

Apparently now that she _was _old enough to like him, her father no longer shared the sentiment.

"Look here, boy. My daughter means a lot to me…" Sora sighed in defeat and leaned back on the flowery couch in Kairi's living room. He steeled himself for the whole "Things you must understand if you're going to date my daughter" talk; he figured he'd have heard it eventually. Just because he hadn't _yet _gotten the courage to ask her on a real date didn't mean he never would.

As the mayor began to lecture him about how being a public official did not mean he was above murder if Sora dared ever hurt Kairi in any way, Sora began to wonder if it was _really _taking Kairi this long to get ready, or if her father just wanted her out of the way during this lovely chat.

Honestly, Sora wondered, how long could it take her to get ready for a walk? That was all it was, really. They were going for a walk through town, to catch up on everything that had happened since they'd parted, and maybe get some ice-cream. They used to do this sort of thing all the time. A year ago their parents wouldn't have thought anything of it. Now it was like they were getting married or something.

Seeing as her father was just beginning to inform Sora that he fully expected his daughter to graduate high school a virgin, Kairi could not have picked a better moment to come bounding down the stairs. Sora practically jumped out of his seat. The mayor abruptly ended his lecture, since he certainly didn't want his daughter to hear _this _part of the conversation. He turned to look at the stairs behind him, giving Sora the opportunity to mouth "SAVE ME!" to Kairi.

Kairi smiled. "I'm ready to go. Not being too hard on poor Sora, are you Daddy?" She frowned at her father.

The man laughed as he stood up and put a hand on her shoulder. "Just talking to your date."

Kairi glared at him as her face tinged pink. "Dad, for the last time, it isn't a date. How many times do I have to tell you?"

Sora sighed. "Thank you." He said aloud. Judging from the look on the mayor's face, he probably shouldn't have said it aloud. However, Kairi was beaming at him.

"You sure are dressed up, though." The mayor was right. Sora had been to busy thanking the heavens for his escape that he hadn't noticed Kairi's apparel. Instead of her normal pink dress, she had opted to where a simple white cotton sundress. It wasn't much longer than her other dress, but the skirt was fuller, and there was a curling flowery design embroidered in light blue along the hem. A simple white crotched sash cinched at the waist, and showed just how narrow the girl was. Since her purple sneakers would have looked ridiculous with this dress, she had donned white sandals.

_She looks like Namine. _

Sora wasn't sure if that thought belonged to Roxas, or to himself, but it was certainly true.

"Not much," Kairi replied, her hands on her hips as she faced down her father. "It's supposed to get really hot today; I just wanted to wear something to keep me cool."

After eyeing them both a moment longer, the mayor surrendered. "Alright then, have a good time."

"Bye Dad," Kairi said, kissing her father's cheek. "Bye Mom!" She yelled, and her mother returned the adieu from the kitchen.

"Come on," Kairi grabbed Sora's hand (which he began to regret leaving ungloved) and pulled him out of her house.

The second they were out of earshot of Kairi's parents, Sora heaved a sigh of relief and turned to Kairi. "Why does your dad suddenly hate me?" He asked, desperate to know the answer, and desperate to find a way to distract his mind from how angelic Kairi looked in the midday sun. The combination of the bright sunlight and the white dress made it seem that Kairi was glowing.

His companion sighed and released Sora's hand. "Because," she began slowly, "He remembers what he was like at fifteen and doesn't trust you anymore."

Sora blushed. This was turning into a very interesting day. "He trusted me a year ago," he said.

Kairi smiled at him. "A year ago you still sounded and acted like a kid," she said matter-of-factly, "Now you're more grown-up."

Sora wilted at the smile she was giving him. Was she aware of the effect she was having on him?

He became very glad there was no one else on the path.

She slipped her hand into his again, sending a shiver up his spine. "You've changed a bit, you know." She continued. "You're so much taller, and I swear your hair is lighter, not to mention messier. And thank goodness your voice has stopped cracking."

Sora couldn't respond. His mouth was very dry, and his brain was having a bit of difficulty putting together coherent thoughts.

"Sora?" They'd stopped walking. Kairi was looking up at him concernedly. "Are you okay?"

Oh, sweet heavens, she was close. She'd taken both his hands in hers, and her blue eyes were staring in to his.

Sora tried to say "I'm fine." But he only got as far as opening his mouth as he realized he couldn't remember how to speak. He closed his mouth and tried again.

Still nothing.

Kairi frowned and pulled him over to a nearby bench. They sat down and she turned his head to look at her. "Sora, what's wrong?"

So, so close. Sora could feel his heart racing. She couldn't hear that, could she?

"Sora?" She was really looking worried. Sora was really feeling worried. She was so close he could feel her breath when she spoke. He didn't trust himself around her this close.

And with good reason.

It couldn't have lasted half a second, but he'd done it nonetheless. He'd only allowed his lips to touch hers long enough to get a brief taste, before the shock had kicked his brain into gear and allowed him to realize the stupidity of his sudden action.

He pulled back immediately. He looked down as his face turned scarlet. After a moment of silence, he chanced a glance at Kairi. She was staring at him with wide eyes. She clearly hadn't been expecting anything of this sort.

Sora needed an excuse, and Sora needed one fast. He couldn't tell if Kairi was pleased or upset at his action; it seemed that she was still in too much shock at what he'd just done.

Suddenly, Sora had a brilliant and preposterous idea: Blame it on Roxas.

"Roxas always really liked Namine." he said, once he'd found his voice.

Kairi blinked at him. "Oh, did he now?" She replied, sounding somewhat breathless.

Sora was finding it increasingly difficult to breathe. "Um, yeah. He, uh, thought she was…nice."

Kairi was beginning to regain her composure. "Oh, really?"

He nodded. This was turning into somewhat of a game. And Kairi was playing along. "Yup. He always thought that she was…was really beautiful. And…you…that dress…" Oh, goodness, he was starting to mess it up. "…you look…kinda more like, like her."

"Hm," Kairi was starting to smile now. "And, I suppose, since Roxas is a part of you, he wanted to let Namine know how much he cared for her?"

Sora swallowed hard. The look on Kairi's face was somewhat, well, the word that came to his mind was coy. "Um, y-yeah. He, uh, he did." Very hard to breathe….

Kairi wasn't buying this, but Sora continued to play the game anyway.

"So," Kairi said, leaning in close to Sora, "Since it would seem that Namine didn't quite get Roxas's message," she was _way _too close now, "that he ought to try again."

She was really close now. But Sora was starting to understand. The game had changed. And he was more than happy to play along. He mirrored her smile, albeit nervously.

"Yeah, I guess he should." Sora was shaking but he leaned closer anyway. His heart was beating so fast it sounded more like it was humming.

"You know," Kairi breathed against his lips, "Namine always really liked Roxas too."

"So, for their sake?" Sora whispered.

Kairi smiled as she closed what little distance there was between them. "For their sake."

LE FIN

* * *

A/N: I don't really know what to say. I'm just amazed I managed to make something out of the scenario of using Roxas and Namine as an excuse. Wheee. 

The review button is an interesting shade of indigo. Click it and it will feel more purple and less BLUE.


	11. Senioritis

**A/N: I know what you're thinking: it took her long enough. Well, I've been writing lots of oneshots, been sick, uber busy, yeah. Plus I've been struggling with this chapter. This one is for YinYangWhiteTiger. So, this probably isn't what you had in mind, but it was what my crazy brain thought of. **

**This one is a little more about the friendship between Riku and Kairi. _Friendship, _not love. So it isn't supposed to Kaiku, though if you really want to I guess maybe you could look at it that way.**

**Their math teacher is based sort of on my own; and Kairi's last name (DeMer) is pronounced Duh (its a short e) Mare. It's an abreviation of "De la mer", which is french for "of the sea", since "Kairi" is japanese for sea and all.**

**Disclaimer:If I owned KH, there would be nothing to even inspire pairings like Akuroku.**

_

* * *

Senioritis_

**Senioritis**-(_n._) a disease commonly affecting High School Seniors (12th graders) with moderate to severe symptoms of cockiness, pride, rudeness, selfishness, and all-around "I'm older and better and cooler because I'm about to graduate and you're not"-ness.

Riku had it. And Riku had it _bad._

True, Riku had always been a cocky, proud little brat; and although his brief but ecstatic flirtation with darkness had humbled him quite a bit, the extended length between his, Sora's, and Kairi's last mission and the beginning of his senior year had caused the pride of being about to finish high school to overwhelm the shame he still felt for having tried to kill his two best friends.

While Sora and Kairi had grown accustomed to Riku's headstrong personality over the years, even they were put off by Riku's attitude. Frankly, Riku was being a jerk. They thought he'd have gotten over it after the first few weeks of school, but they were nearly a month in and Riku's ego was showing no sign of deflating.

"Hey, Riku!" Riku idly glanced behind him to see who was calling his name. The group of senior friends who he'd been talking to paused their conversation as Sora and Kairi approached, looking somewhere between worried and annoyed.

"Is your phone broken or something?" Sora asked, frowning at him. "I called you like, a million times this weekend, and you never answered. And where were you Friday? I must have called you thirty times just that night!"

"We were gonna go to the island on Saturday, remember?" Kairi scolded.

Riku raised an eyebrow at his two friends. "Sorry." He growled, although he certainly didn't sound it. "I was at a party Friday; I was a little preoccupied." He smirked at his older friends, who chuckled in fond remembrance of the party in question.

"Party?" Sora asked, confused as to what party his best friend would have attended without him.

Riku gave Sora his patented smirk. "Oh, I forgot, it was a _seniors only _party. No little kiddies allowed." His other friends laughed. Sora and Kairi glared.

"I heard about that party," Kairi said in a tone that was simultaneously honey-sweet and bitingly malicious, "Madeline and Louise's double birthday party, right?" Her smile was innocent, but her eyes glared daggers at Riku. "Interesting, Riku. I didn't know you hung out with such hussies."

Riku's friends started laughing. He sneered. Kairi's sardonic smile _grated _on his nerves. She looked so proud of herself for burning him so.

"I hang out with you don't I?" As he had predicted, his comeback wiped the smirk off of Kairi's face.

He also should have predicted that she would slap him. Her palm collided with his face so hard that his neck audibly popped as it turned his head around to face his fellow seniors. When he opened his eyes, he was staring at their shocked faces.

"Okay," he said, opting to keep his head where it was rather than turn so she could hit him again, "I suppose I kind of deserved that." His friends nodded at him.

Riku turned his head to face Sora and Kairi again, about to somewhat apologize.

He supposed he should have predicted that Sora would sock him.

)&(

Riku grumpily stomped into his PreCalculus class, still holding an ice-pack over his nose. It was still throbbing. At least it had stopped bleeding.

He plopped his books down on a desk in the back of the class. The day had started so well. Up until his conversation with Sora and Kairi, things had been going pretty smoothly. Sora and Kairi…They were his best friends, but sometimes they acted like such, such…such _juniors. _Underclassmen, what could you do with them?

So, he supposed, perhaps he had gone a little far calling Kairi a hussy. But it was all in good fun; it wasn't like he _meant _it. He could understand her being a little upset, but did she really need to hit him? And then Sora punching him…and then not even getting in trouble. Riku glared at the whiteboard. Well, he thought, at least Sora hadn't pulled his keyblade on him…little runt could still kick his butt…

Riku lazily doodled on his notebook paper as Mr. Forrest began writing notes on the board. Not that Riku particularly cared. The arctangent of the angle of the tip of his keyblade to the heartless's head; yeah, he'd really need to know that one day. He only needed to do enough to get to graduation, anyway.

The classroom door opened. Riku didn't bother looking up to see who had entered.

"Excuse me?" Riku froze. He closed his eyes. _Oh Lord, no. _The voice, light as air and sweet as sugar continued. "Sorry I'm late; I was told I've been moved to this class." Riku didn't even need to look up as the teacher confirmed the intruder's name on his class list.

"Ah, yes. Kairi DeMer?"

"Yes, sir."

Riku groaned softly. Perfect.

"Have a seat anywhere. We were just getting started."

Riku was still staring at his notebook and yet he could still feel Kairi's icy glare.

This day just kept getting better and better.

)&(

Riku was starting to see why Kairi had been moved to a senior math class.

Brilliant was the understatement of the century. She was excellent at art; why did she have to be such a genius in math too?

Riku, on the other hand, was surprised he hadn't been moved to remedial math yet.

"Alright, to give you all some practice on this, I want you to do this worksheet with a partner. You can pick your partner," the teacher said. Riku exhaled. It was great when the teachers didn't pair them up.

"Riku," Riku's breath caught in his throat. "You seem to be having some trouble with this. I want you to work with Kairi; see if she can't help you get this." Riku could've sworn he died, right then and there. Kairi? Why, why!?

Kairi didn't look thrilled about working with him, either. Apparently she was still upset.

Riku let his head fall onto his desk. He could hear Kairi placing her books on the desk beside him and getting out her things. He waited and waited for her to say something, but after several minutes of silence he looked up. Kairi was working on the assignment. Alone. She was already halfway down the page. Riku looked at his own worksheet. He didn't need her. How hard could this be?

Riku didn't have the slightest clue how to do this.

He looked over at Kairi. "Well?"

She made no reply.

Riku sighed. "Aren't you going to help me do this?"

Kairi didn't even look up. "You are a great and almighty senior. You don't need the help of a lowly junior like me."

Riku rolled his eyes. "Okay, look, so I'm a little bit excited about this being my last year of high school. Why is that so wrong?"

"Because," Kairi growled, turning from her paper to glare at him. "You're acting like a jerk. The last time I can remember you acting like this, it was when you were working for Maleficent and trying to destroy the worlds and kill Sora!" She angrily returned to trying to work on the class assignment.

Anger flared up in Riku. He grimaced. "That was low. Really low, Kairi."

"Well, it's true." Kairi replied without looking up.

Riku scowled. "I may have tried to destroy the worlds, but I'm not the one who screwed up the memories of their occupants. And I may have tried to kill Sora, but at least I didn't forget him."

Kairi's pencil halted. Riku knew he shouldn't have said it, but he was so mad he didn't care.

Kairi's pencil _snapped._ Riku felt strangely proud that he had hurt her.

"Well, it's _true._" Riku said softly, mocking her. He'd said it quietly, half-hoping she hadn't heard; half-hoping she _had._

Apparently she had. Kairi stood and rounded on him, glaring at him with a fury Riku had encountered few times before. It was the look she'd given Saix; it was the look she'd given the heartless standing between herself and Sora; the look Naminé had given DiZ after he'd had her erase Roxas's memories; it was the same look of furious hatred she'd always reserved for those who threatened her friendship with himself and Sora.

And now she was looking at him with that same fury. Riku felt his heart sink.

"How _dare _you!" she shouted. Everyone else in the classroom quieted and turned to stare.

Riku rose from his seat to glare down at her. "You started it!"

"_I _started it?!" She shrieked incredulously.

"You brought up what happened with Maleficent!"

"_You_ brought up Castle Oblivion!"

"Well you're the one who called me a jerk!"

"You called me a _hussy!_"

"Enough!" Riku and Kairi turned to see their teacher glaring angrily at the both of them. "Come with me. Both of you."

The two teens silently followed their teacher out of the classroom and down the hall to an empty classroom. He turned to face them.

"Okay, I don't know what this is about, but clearly you two need to work something out. Friend troubles, relationship drama, whatever, work it out! I don't know what's wrong; all I know is that you're disrupting my class. So, after you've fought it out because he cheated, or she's pregnant, come back to my class." Mr. Forrest sighed as he finished his tongue lashing.

"A guy and girl are fighting, so automatically you assume it's romantic drama. How stereotypical." Kairi hissed quietly.

The teacher rolled his eyes. "Whatever! Whatever is wrong, don't come back to my class until you figure it out!" And he turned and left.

Silence reigned.

"I can't believe you got us into this mess."

Riku rounded on her. "_I _got us into this mess?"

Kairi turned to glare at him. "Yes. _You _got us into this."

Riku rolled his eyes. "_You're _the one who started yelling!"

Kairi huffed a sigh. "Because you brought up Naminé! Because you brought up everything that happened at Castle Oblivion! You were guilt tripping _both _sides of my heart! You were taking jabs at both Kairi _and _Naminé! That was low! Lower than me bringing up you giving into darkness!" Riku was silenced by Kairi's outburst. She seemed to be on the verge of tears, and yet she still stood her ground; even though she was obviously exasperated. "You're just being such a, a…jerk!" Riku could tell from her expression that there was another word she was dying to replace 'jerk' with.

Riku wasn't quite sure how to respond. "You're still mad about this morning, aren't you?"

Kairi groaned and rolled her eyes. "Of _course_ I'm still mad about this morning! You called me a hussy!"

"It's not like I meant it! And so what; you called Madeline and Louise hussies," Riku bit back.

Kairi chuckled darkly. "Madeline and Louise _are _hussies." She said matter-of-factly. "Everyone knows that those two are the skankiest you-know-what's in the whole school. I can't believe that you ditched Sora and I to go to one their parties!"

Riku sat down in one of the desks. They were never getting back to class. "Just because I don't spend as much time with him as you do doesn't mean I was ditching you."

Kairi took a seat in another desk and crossed her arms. "Look, just…" She shook her head. "Nevermind. We're not getting anywhere here." She blew her hair out of her face. "It isn't just that you ditched us. You've been treating us like dirt for weeks! But, oh, how could I forget, we are underclassmen." She continued sarcastically, "We are lower than dirt; we are the scum of the earth. Lower, even. We are the stain of the scum of the earth! And you are the almighty, infallible, amazing senior!" She stood and mock-bowed. "We are not worthy! We are not worthy!" She plopped back down in her seat and refused to look at him.

Riku didn't know how to respond. Oh sure, he had an arsenal of appropriately sarcastic comebacks at his disposal (the classic 'Go take a Midol' seemed good for this situation), but Kairi's attitude was starting to get to him. He hated having his friends mad at him; especially Kairi. Kairi rarely got this angry; Sora ticked her off on occasion, but it took something really striking to infuriate her to this level. This got Riku thinking; perhaps he had been a bit mean to his friends lately. Okay, so maybe he had been more than a little mean.

The more Riku thought about it, the more he realized how horrid of a friend he had been lately. Kairi was right; he had been treating his friends like dirt. He'd been such a 'jerk', which probably translated into something a lot worse in Kairi's mind, but came out as 'jerk' because Kairi was too moral to curse.

Wait, Kairi was _right._ Crap.

She hadn't said anything yet. She just sat there and focused on not looking at him. Aside from being a Princess of Heart, Kairi was also a Princess of sucking all friendly warmth from the room when she was angry at you.

Riku hated swallowing his pride. There were few things he loathed more than admitting he was wrong. Especially to Kairi; mostly because it also meant admitting that Kairi was pretty much _always _right. But Riku also despised Kairi being mad at him. Crap.

Riku took a _deep, deep _breath. "Kairi?"

"What?" she snapped, still refusing to look at him.

Riku took another deep breath. "I…I'm…" Crap. He'd have to go through this all over again with Sora. Kairi turned to look at him skeptically.

Riku sighed. "I'm sorry." Kairi still looked doubtful.

"You're sorry for what?" She asked sardonically.

Riku groaned. "I'm sorry for treating you and Sora like dirt. I've been a horrible best friend and I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! You were right, and I was wrong! There, are you happy now?" Riku stared at her exasperatedly. He expected Kairi to give him that soft smile and tell him that she forgave him, but that didn't mean she wouldn't yell at him if he didn't drop the attitude; or something like that.

Instead, Kairi sprang from her chair and flung her arms around his middle. Riku stared in confusion at the top of her auburn head. Riku wasn't quite sure what to make of the tiny Kairi currently clamped to his chest. He was about to ask what had gotten into her, but Kairi smiled up at him.

"It's good to have you back, Riku," she told him sweetly. Riku smiled and pulled her into a brotherly hug.

He released her and she frowned playfully at him. "Now, if you don't lose the senioritis attitude, dear _sanpai_, I'll turn my keyblade on you. I've got a new keychain I'm just _dying _to try out." Riku honestly didn't doubt that.

"Lesson learned," Riku assured her.

"I suppose we could go back to class now." Kairi suggested.

Riku thought about that. "I suppose so. Back to Pre-Calculus, and vectors and factoids…and I don't know what else. I don't get it anyway."

He and Kairi exchanged looks.

"Or we could just fight some more." Kairi suggested cheerfully.

Riku smiled. "I vote we fight more."

* * *

**I really liked that one. "Madeline and Louise" is a reference to the charecters on Gilmore Girls. These two went to high school with Rory, and they were exactly what Kairi described them as. And yes, Riku getting slapped is totally a POTC reference. **

**I'm still taking requests and ideas. Just tell me your ideas, and if I like them, I may use them. But that means you have to review.**

**SHAMELESS PLUG: Like Namixas? Read Much Ado About Nothing. Like general drabbles? Read Glimmering Snippets. Like pure, goopy, sokai? Read Sukairain. I don't know how to improve them unless people review and tell me why they aren't working.**

**Thanks for reading! Everyone, really, you guys are great!**


	12. Salvage

**A/N: Yay, update! This one is kinda short, and kinda OOC, but I'm on Spring Break, so I may update again very soon. I don't know when I'm going to the beach, so I don't know what my window for updating is. Depends on if we take the laptop with us, and whether or not our hotel room has wi-fi. **

**I've had this idea for like, forever. Mrs. Mirren is totally based on my chemistry teacher. Professor Mirrow kind of was too, but she was more, I don't know, scatterbrained than my teacher is. Whereas everything that Mrs. Mirren says I can totally hear coming out of my teacher's mouth. **

**Thanks for all my reviews! You guys are AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! With lots of exclamation points!!!**

**Disclaimer: God has given me many things. But He didn't give me Kingdom Hearts.**

_Salvage_

"Please! Ten points, ten points!"

"No, Sora, I'm not giving you ten points of extra credit!" Mrs. Mirren shook her head and took a step back from the frantic brunette on his knees on the floor of her classroom.

Sora scooted a little closer, his hands clasped together; pleading with his teacher. "Please, just ten points! That'll bring my grade up all I need, please!"

Mrs. Mirren rolled her eyes. "Sora, no! I'm not giving you extra credit just because you saved the universe."

"Twice!" Sora held up two fingers. "I saved it twice! And a half! The half being the time I can't remember because Kairi's alter ego wiped my memory! That's gotta count for something!"

Mrs. Mirren rolled her eyes at the boy's desperation. "In the grand scheme of things, we're very thankful for that, but I'm not giving you extra credit for it. Although I have to say, that in my 35 years of teaching I've never had such an original plea for extra credit." She turned and began flipping through the grade book on her desk. "If you want to bring your grade up, I would suggest a tutor." She turned back to stare at him. "As in, someone _other _than your girlfriend. As you have shown in my class, you find staring at Kairi infinitely more entertaining than chemistry. While having her tutor you may work for you in that you have more time to stare at her, I highly doubt any learning is going on."

Sora stared dejectedly up at his teacher, trying to come up with something, anything else to say that might convince her to give him a few points of extra credit.

"But, but…"

Mrs. Mirren sighed and rolled her eyes again. "No buts. I can barely give you credit for normal assignments! Why should I give you extra credit when you don't even do the regular work?"

"I do too do my work!"

"Oh really?" Mrs. Mirren looked down at her grade book. "Because I have a whole column of red marks that says you don't."

Sora grimaced. "Okay, so I don't always do _well_, but I do it!"

Mrs. Mirren looked back down at him. "Name the chemical symbol for Antimony."

"Uuh…" Sora thought for a moment. "An?"

His teacher raised an eyebrow. "Do you see an 'An' on that periodic table?" She pointed to the large periodic table hanging on the wall.

Sora bit his lip. "Uh, I meant," he glanced at the periodic table again. Antimony, antimony, which one was antimony? "Uh, it's 'At'?"

"No."

"As?"

"No."

"Ar?"

"Getting colder."

"Ac?"

"You're getting frostbite."

"Um…"

Mrs. Mirren put down her grade book and rubbed her temples. "There isn't an A in it. Kind of like your grades right now. It's 'Sb'."

Sora raised an eyebrow. "Sb?"

"For stibium. The old name for antimony. You were supposed to learn those too."

Sora slumped defeatedly on the floor.

"And you mother wonders why you're failing…"

She started to walk away and Sora, filled with the sudden dread of facing his mother, leaped forward and grasped her ankle, clinging to her leg. "Wait!"

Mrs. Mirren turned to stare at him. "What are you doing?"

"Five points, five points." Sora held up five fingers. "Just five. That'll bring my grade up to a low D, my mom can live with a D, just as long as I don't have an F! And if she can live with it, then that means that I will live because she won't feel the impulse to kill me! And if she doesn't kill me, then I will live to save the universe again! Mrs. Mirren, wouldn't you hate that the universe was destroyed because the person who was supposed to save it was dead because his mother killed him because he failed Chemistry! And all of that could have been avoided if only you'd given him five points of extra credit that would have brought his grade up to something his mother would consider okay. Mrs. Mirren, you are sealing the fate of the universe by failing me!"

Mrs. Mirren sighed and stared down at him. She frowned at Sora for a moment, thinking.

"I can live with that."

* * *

A/N: Um, yeah. Not much to say, really. I think the old name for antimony was stibium...I have a good grade in chemistry, promise. I think. I hope. Hmm. 


	13. Senior Wills

**A/N: Okay, so, sorry that its been a good long while since I've updated, and I'm sorry that this update is so short. I actually have a few other ideas in the works, but I'm too tired today to work on them. Prom was last night, so I'm still tired from dancing for 4 hours. Plus my great aunt died yesterday. (for more info check out the author note at the beginning of chap. 12 of Much Ado About Nothing) Our school does the senior wills at Prom, and I was inspired my that. What exactly would the KH gang will each other in their senior wills? **

**Disclaimer: Nobody willed me Kingdom Hearts...**

_Senior Wills_

_**Riku Mayonaka**_

I, the amazing Riku do will:

-Sora: At least two feet of my height. The ability to tell jokes that are actually funny. The ability to beat me _without _the help of your keyblade. Shoes that actually fit. The freedom to tell Kairi that you'd rather hang out with us than with her sometimes. The kind of mindset that would mean that you _honestly would _like to hang out with us instead of her sometimes. My muscles. Garden gnomes.

-Kairi: A less girly keyblade. Sora. A tan. The ability to cast a Fire spell without burning yourself. Anonymity, so you won't get kidnapped (again). That year of your life back. 20 lbs. Professor Mirrow to remember your name. Lots of crayons. Chocolate.

-Naminé: The ability to occasionally leave Kairi alone. To get over your fear of wearing color.

-Roxas: The ability to leave Sora alone.

-Selphie: A weapon that would not be found in a PE class workout. A boyfriend.

-Tidus: A new pair of pants.

-Wakka: the realization that there is more to life than blitzball.

_One year later_

_**Sora Chigiri**_

I will:

Kairi: my heart, my love, and a smaller lung capacity, so when we make out, I don't pass out. More weight. To fail at SOMETHING for once. Colored pencils. All of the chocolate in the world. A nobody who doesn't constantly bother you. A nobody who isn't scared of wearing color. A keyblade that doesn't look like it used to belong to Barbie.

Even though he isn't here anymore, I will Riku: a girl, a haircut, and the ability to drive.

Roxas: the ability to shut up.

Selphie: a REAL weapon. A paopu fruit and a guy to share it with.

Wakka: a new accent.

Professor Mirrow: the ability to remember Kairi's name.

Mrs. Mirren: the years shaved off your life from dealing with me for two years. The patience to put up with me until graduation.

_**Kairi DeMer Hikari:**_

As my last living will and testament, I do hereby bequeath in all seriousness:

Sora-my heart, and all the love within it. A good grade in Chemistry. Shoes that fit. A longer attention span. The ability to never stop being a sappy dork. My lucky keychain. Hair that never stops defying the laws of physics without even using hair gel.

Riku-a girlfriend. Bangs that don't look emo. My keyblade in all its flowery girlyness. The ability to drive.

Selphie-an amazing, romantic, sweet-as-all-get-out boyfriend to share a paopu fruit with. An actual weapon and the ability to use it. My amazing ability to make even a dorky school uniform look fabulous. Adderall or some other form of ADD medication. More sugar.

Professor Mirrow-the ability to remember my name.

Mrs. Mirren-students as good as me. The patience to deal with Sora.

Mr. Forrest-a wife. Art classes where you will have to draw straight lines without rulers, and circles without compasses! Classes as entertaining as the ones with Riku and me in them.

_**Selphie Tilmitt**_

I will Sora: Kairi. Good grades. ADHD medication. The ability to understand girls.

I will Kairi: Perpetual beauty. All my shoes. Sora. Hair that will hold curls. Immunity from sunburns.

I will Tidus: A real sword. Interest in something other than fighting and blitzball.

I will Wakka: Ability to like more than just blitzball.

* * *

AN: Several references to previous chapters. I know, its short, and sucky, but once I've gotten some rest I'll start working on my other ideas. Riku's last name means something like Midnight, Sora's last name (Chigiri) means oath, or promise.

PREVIEWS:

_Habillement: _Leave it to Kairi to turn a legendary weapon of unfathomable power into a fashion statement.

_Loser League: "Sh-she cheated!" Sora stuttered, as he stared at Kairi, who was hopping up and down on home plate. "Did not!" she chirped enthusiastically. "There's nothing in the rules that said I can't play, and there's nothing in the rules that says I can't employ my womanly charm to avoid getting an out!" "It's lunchtime stickball, there are no rules!" Sora argued, still dazed. Kairi smirked. "No rules means there's nothing against me distracting you to keep from being hit by the ball! Therefore I didn't cheat!" "I missed it," Tidus said, scratching his head. "What did she do to distract you?" Sora's face turned crimson. "Sh-she kissed me!"_

I'm still taking ideas. If I like your ideas, I may do them. Also, keep in mind when submitting your ideas that I've never played any of the Final Fantasy games. Tis why I usually avoid writing the FF charecters...

Reviews are nice.


	14. Loser League

**A/N: BE HAPPY. Somewhere inbetween the chemistry project due tuesday, the normal homework for monday and tuesday, getting Tender is the Night by F.S. Fitzgerald read by tuesday, half my art portfolio (7 pieces) being due yesterday and me not getting that done (um, I have 5...okay, four and a half), failling PE (who ever heard of tests and written work in PE!! It's ridiculous!!), and the loads of more productive and more important things I should be doing right now, I managed to get this finished and posted. Don't know when this'll be updated again. Don't know when MAAN will be updated...I have so much to do!! The whole concept here is based on watching the guys play stickball at lunch. All the 'rules' and everything are based on my observations of them. The 'Loser League' or the 'Little Brain League' is what my best friend and I have named their league. Enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, this statement would be adjacent to the word 'Claimer'. I own naught but this story.**

_Loser League_

"Aw, c'mon Chigiri! If you keep hitting home runs all day, we'll lose all our tennis balls!" Sora merely smirked and continued his leisurely stroll around their make-shift baseball diamond. Actually, it was nothing more than part of the school courtyard which they had commandeered for their game of lunchtime stickball. Sora was rather proud of his ability to send the tennis balls flying onto the roof of the auditorium which flanked the 'field'. Seeing as they only had so many tennis balls to use, this usually became problematic after a while.

Kairi shook her head as she watched the guys at their game. "He's showing off today because he knows I'm watching. Rather stupid of him actually, since it means that they'll run out of tennis balls early."

Selphie nodded. "Look at that! It isn't enough to just hit the batter with the ball to get him out, is it?"

Kairi laughed. "Right. Clearly, one must hit the batter, wrestle them to the ground, and then beat him repeatedly with the tennis ball before the batter is actually out." It was quite entertaining to see a dozen or so teenage boys at a game of stickball. Rules seemed to be nigh nonexistent; as were teams. It seemed to be every man for himself. They seemed to have some sort of batting order, though. The exact location of the bases was also questionable. The goal seemed to be to hit the ball (they had some sort of boundaries by which to judge fouls), run around in some sort of path that would indicate the lines between bases, an d then back to home without being hit by one of the many tennis balls that seemed to all simultaneously be in play.

Honestly, it made the entire experience of attending high school worth it.

"They don't seem to care who joins the game or when. It'd be nice to see a girl go up there," Selphie commented casually, before sipping her juice. "I'd do it, but I know I'd make a fool of myself." Kairi turned to look at her friend for a moment, before turning her now pensive gaze back to the game.

"We're not out of tennis balls yet, are we, Tidus?" Sora asked, taking some form of the position of outfielder (exact positions, other than batter and pitcher, seemed entirely subjective).

The blonde shook his head. "Nah, we've got plenty left, I think. Just stop hitting 'em so far, will you?" Sora grinned apologetically.

"It's because Kairi's watching!" Riku shouted from nearby. "He's showing off!"

"Shut up!" Sora shouted back, aggravated.

While they were having their lovely little conversation, the next batter had taken their position and was awaiting Wakka's pitch.

"Yo Sora!" One of the boys playing shouted, "Get your girlfriend off the field!" Sora's head whipped around so fast he nearly gave himself vertigo. Sure enough, Kairi was standing ready on home base, stick in hand, awaiting the ball.

"Who says I can't play?" she asked indignantly, placing a hand on her hip. The boys exchanged looks. They all knew there really was nothing stopping her from playing, but still; a _girl _joining the game? Unheard of!

Kairi waited patiently while the boys gathered in the center of the field to discuss the dilemma. "So, what now?" Tidus asked, glancing over at the redhead. "I mean, it isn't like there's school rules against her playing. But still…" An uneasy silence ensued, and all eyes gravitated towards Sora. He looked around as he noticed that everyone was looking at him.

"What?" He asked obliviously. The other guys merely stared at him. Suddenly he caught their drift. He frowned and held up his hands. "Oh no!" He shook his head vehemently. "No way!"

"C'mon, she's _your _girlfriend!" Someone pointed out.

"Yeah!" someone else agreed. "_You _tell her she can't play. She'll listen to you."

Sora frowned at the person who had spoken. "You've never had a girlfriend, have you?"

Riku rolled his eyes. "Just go tell her she can't play."

Sora grimaced and groaned. "Fine."

Kairi smiled in mock innocence as Sora approached. He sighed as he stopped in front of her. "What are you doing?" He asked plainly.

"Trying to play," she replied, still smiling. "Why won't you let me?"

Sora frowned, trying to come up with a halfway valid excuse. "Because…it's against the rules for someone to join in the middle of a game." He smiled, pleased with his impromptu rule.

Kairi frowned, not fooled. "Sora, it's lunchtime stickball. There aren't any rules. There isn't even a first base or third base. There's home and a tree that serves as second base. Don't tell me there's any rule against me playing. You boys just don't want me playing because I'm a girl."

Sora wilted under her stare. He tried once more to salvage the situation. "Well, I just don't want you making a fool of yourself." Maybe that would work.

Kairi laughed. "Nice try, but I don't care. Just give me a chance." Then came The Look.

And there was simply no escaping The Look. Sora turned, sighing dejectedly and shaking his head as he made his way back over to the other guys. "Well?" Wakka asked, as Sora approached, looking none too victorious.

Sora shook his head. "She won't listen to me. I say, if she wants to make a fool of herself, let her. She'll miss it, she'll strike out, and then she'll leave us alone."

The other boys seemed okay with this. Riku, now serving as pitcher, exchanged a worried look with Sora. "Should I go easy on her, or try to strike her out quickly?"

Sora glanced over at the princess who was still awaiting her turn. "Let's just get this over with."

Riku shrugged and the boys took their positions. Kairi smiled at her small victory. She readied herself for the pitch. She had already abandoned her knee socks and clogs so as to be better able to run. This new development of a girl joining the game had attracted the attention of quite a few of the people who had not already been watching the game.

Currently there were about four tennis balls in play, including the one Riku held. Common courtesy demanded that the batter be allowed to actually get somewhere on the field before any of the other balls were used. Needless to say, many of the boys expected that they wouldn't need to use any of them.

Riku blew his bangs out of his eyes. Strike Kairi out quickly; that was the plan.

Of course, in life, few things ever go according to plan.

The stick in Kairi's hands slammed against the tennis ball, sending the ball flying across that section of the courtyard in a yellow-green blur, before hitting a spot high on the wall of the auditorium directly across the 'field'. Before the ball had even hit the building, though, Kairi had dropped the stick and took off around the bases; or at least around where the bases would be had they actually been clearly defined. About the time the tennis ball hit the ground, the shock wore off and the boys sprang into action. Tidus took off after the ball Kairi had hit, while the other boys tried to peg Kairi with the ones they already held. Kairi proved to be an elusive target. Being a girl, she was already a smaller target, and her speed was something they hadn't been counting on. She bounded past the general first base area, hopping in the air to avoid the ball thrown at her. As she flew past second base (the only truly defined base) she found herself nearing Sora, who had just been tossed one of the remaining tennis balls.

Sora sent a quick questioning glare to the person who'd thrown him the ball before turning to confront Kairi, who had slowed down a bit so as to be better able to maneuver around his throws. Their eyes met for a moment, and Sora heard someone yell, "Now's no time to be a gentleman, Sora! Tackle her!"

However, just as Sora was about to attempt to hit Kairi with the ball, she bounded forward with seemingly inhuman speed, wrapped a hand around his plaid tie, and yanked him forward to meet her lips all in one deft movement. Such a kiss as she bestowed upon him in that instant would have been enough to royally blow his mind under normal circumstances, and considering the pure spontantaneity of the action at this particular time, Sora's head was sent reeling in utter confusion and pure romantic bliss. The kiss only lasted long enough for a very thick haze to cloud Sora's mind and his muscles to relax enough for the tennis ball to drop from his hand.

The jolt from being shoved roughly to the ground awoke Sora to the reality that the game was still on, and that he had just been tricked. All this still registered dimly, and Sora struggled to get to his shaking feet as Riku bolted past him, snatching at the ball Sora had dropped and yelling sarcastically as he passed, "_Nice_, Sora!" As Sora finally managed to scramble to his feet, Riku desperately chucked the tennis ball at Kairi, missed spectacularly, and watched as she reached her destination.

Groaning in frustration, the boys made their way defeatedly over to home plate, where Kairi was cheerfully celebrating her victory. "Sh-she cheated!" Sora stuttered dazedly, having finally stumbled over to join them. He stared at Kairi, who was hopping up and down on home plate.

"Did not!" she chirped enthusiastically. "There's nothing in the rules that said I can't play, and there's nothing in the rules that says I can't...employ my womanly charm to avoid getting an out!"

"It's lunchtime stickball, there are no rules!" Sora argued, still dazed, and therefore not thinking clearly about what he was saying.

Kairi smirked. "No rules means there's nothing against me distracting you to keep from being hit by the ball! Therefore I didn't cheat!"

"I missed it," Tidus said, scratching his head. "What did she do to distract you?"

Sora's face turned crimson. "Sh-she kissed me!"

There was silence for a moment, followed by ill-stifled sniggers. "And you're complaining?" Riku pointed out, smirking.

Sora glared. "That's not the point! She cheated!"

Kairi was still bouncing. "How can I cheat? It's lunchtime stickball! There aren't any rules! There isn't a first or third base! Face it boys," she said smugly, "I can play just as well as any of you. Nay, _better _than most of you." She grinned.

"Do-over!" Sora suggested, still simmering from being the reason Kairi had made the run. "Riku'll pitch again! And if Kairi can make it around again, _without any tricks, _then it'll count."

Kairi contemplated the proposal. "If I make it again, they both count, and you'll all have to admit that I'm just as good and possibly better at this than all of you and then I'll be out of your overly gelled hair. If I don't, I'll leave you all alone and never grace your field ever again."

The guys huddled together for a moment to consider the situation. Finally, "Deal."

Everyone took their positions. "Remember Kairi," Riku shouted as he prepared to pitch, "No tricks this time." She nodded.

"You say that like I can't do it without them."

The air was much more intense than before. The first time the guys hadn't been expecting Kairi to hit the ball at all. But now... There were hardly any people in the courtyard _not _watching the game. Even the teachers on lunch duty, whose job it normally would have been to promptly hand Sora and Kairi demerits for the blatant PDA, were too interested in the aftermath to interrupt the game.

Riku focused all of his concentration into throwing a pitch Kairi wouldn't be able to hit far-if she managed to hit it at all. Kairi's sharp indigo eyes narrowed; Riku's hand let loose the pitch; Kairi swung-

The tennis ball flew _over _the auditorium.

And Kairi _danced_ around the bases.

* * *

AN: I hope this episode is a little bit more up to snuff. Hope y'all like. Review please, and I'm sorry if I don't reply to all of them. Like I said, I'm uber busy! I'm getting off the computer now to go get some work done. So, seee yaaa!

* * *


	15. Habillement

**A/N: **I know I've kept you guys waiting for a while, but I've been busy. I've been working on the final chapters of Much Ado About Nothing, and I wanted to finish an illustration for this particular oneshot before I wrote and published it. Finally, the illustration from this oneshot is up. There is a link to it on my profile page. Please check it out, but not until you've read the story. In other news, I can finally legally drive my car. I got my learner's permit monday; a good year and ten months after turning 15. I'm less than two months from 17, and just now getting it. Unfortunately, my car may be totalled cuz of my step-sister wrecking it around Christmas.

This oneshot: Habillement is french for clothing, or something to that effect. Oneshot, implied sokai.

**Disclaimer: The line from the final cutscene: "It's always closer than you think" in reference to the door to the light didn't make sense to me until 3:40 last night. Do you think I own Kingdom Hearts?**

_Habillement_

Sora yawned as he raised a sleepy fist to knock on Kairi's front door. She'd better have a darn good reason for dragging him out of bed before noon on a Saturday. Kairi's mother answered the door, and Sora immediately braced himself for the crushing hug she was about to give him. She'd always adored Sora and Riku for the part they had played in finding Kairi, and thereby giving her the daughter she'd always wanted. After having his ribs cracked, the mayor's wife told Sora that Kairi was in her room waiting for him.

"Thanks, Mrs. Hikari!" Sora promptly sped up the stairs before she could offer him some of the brownies that had just come out of the oven. Sora's mother had given Mrs. Hikari baking lessons years ago, and ever since then the woman had been under the delusion that she could actually bake from scratch.

Sora stopped in front of Kairi's door and knocked lightly. "Kairi?" No response. He knocked again. "Kairi?" Still nothing. Sora shrugged and opened the door. Immediately he was dive-bombed by several items of clothing. One of these hit his head and stuck there-hanging from one of his brown spikes. Sora reached up to retrieve said item of clothing and discovered that it was a lacy blue bra. Sora immediately flung the unmentionable away and shook his hands like he'd touched something poisonous.

At least it seemed that Kairi hadn't seen this. Judging from the random clothes flying out of her closet, she was currently digging through it. "Uh, Kairi?" Sora asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked at all the clothes scattered about her normally spotless room. "What are you doing?"

The fabric flinging stopped and Kairi poked her head out of the walk-in closet. She grinned. "Hi Sora! I'm just going through my closet!"

Sora tilted his head to the side. "You said you needed me for something that had to do with our next journey. You said it was urgent..." And yet here she was going through her closet...

Kairi nodded as she exited the closet. "I'm trying to figure out what to wear." she stated, as if this explained everything.

"Today? But you're already dressed," Sora said slowly, clearly very confused.

Kairi rolled her eyes. "No. To fight in. I'm trying to figure out what to wear on our journey."

Sora sat down on Kairi's bed; or rather, Sora's mind was so blown away by Kairi's definition of "important matter that has to do with our mission" that his legs collapsed and her bed just happened to be there for him to rest his rear on. When Sora finally regained his powers of speech, he began by asking, "Can't you fight in your pink dress?"

Kairi nodded. "Of course. I can fight great in my pink dress."

Sora didn't understand. "So why can't you just wear it?"

Kairi looked at him like he was crazy. "It doesn't match my keyblade." Sora wasn't sure if he should find this hilarious or disturbing. She was dead serious.

Leave it to Kairi to take a legendary weapon of unfathomable power and turn it into a fashion statement.

"It...doesn't...match...your...keyblade," Sora repeated slowly. "You've got to be kidding me."

Kairi shook her head and summoned her keyblade. "See? They don't match. My dress is light pink. The pink of my keyblade is more of a rosy, reddish pink. Almost a magenta. And the light pink clashed with the gold." She frowned. Sora stared.

"Kairi, I don't think the heartless are going to care. It's a battlefield, not a runway."

Kairi scoffed. "Nonsense. Every day is a fashion show, every road is a runway. Self-confidence is important when it comes to fighting-you said it yourself. Well, my confidence would be much higher if my clothes weren't clashing with my keyblade." Sora gave up trying to argue with her after that. Kairi was a sensible girl in every other respect. She deserved to be unreasonable when it came to _something_. So Sora sat and waited while Kairi dug through her closet, trying to put together a traveling outfit that was both fashionable and functional.

Finally, "I think I've got it!" She stuck her head out, "I'm changing, so no peeking!" And so Sora waited. And waited. And waited. At last, the closet door opened and Kairi stepped out. Sora's jaw dropped at Kairi's clothing-or lack thereof, for there certainly wasn't as much of it.

Her shirt was much the same style as her pink zippered dress had been, but it was light blue and cut off at her waist. Instead of the white hooded tank top beneath it, she wore what looked like a golden-yellow halter-top bikini, and the blue shirt's middle zipper was unzipped so low that Sora could see the dark pink ring that held the bikini top together. Her skirt was a similar dark pink-if it could really be called a skirt. It was more like two flaps of fabric sewn together at the top two corners so that they could hang around Kairi's hips. Such high slits demanded Kairi wear a pair of short, dark golden shorts beneath. A belt in the same lighter golden yellow of her top adorned her hips. There were free sleeves of a dark rose pink around her upper arms, stretching from just below her underarms, down to just above her elbows, and each of the tight sleeves had a silver zipper holding it together. She had traded her sneakers for a pair of dark gold boots the same color as her shorts. They were low-heeled to make running and fighting easy, and they reached almost to her knees. They had a silver zipper down the front, and dark rose pink ribbons criss-crossed like shoestrings over the zippers.

Sora was left speechless. His first reaction was amazement that Kairi was actually wearing something like this, and was comfortable with it to boot. Was she aware of how revealing those clothes were? Did she even care? She was a few months past sixteen, Sora reasoned, so it wasn't like she was dressing totally scandalously for her age. Also taking into consideration that she'd grown up on a scorching hot island where running around in as little clothing as possible was not only culturally acceptable, but almost necessary, Kairi's clothing was really quite appropriate. This left Sora wondering why it was bothering him so much. It was Kairi, he decided, and he would never quite adjust to the fact that this girl was once nothing more than a childhood friend.

She summoned her keyblade. Well, she definitely matched. "So," she asked, smiling nervously. "What do you think?"

"Of what?" Sora asked dumbly, still staring.

Kairi rolled her eyes. "Of my clothes. How do I look?"

Incredible, amazing, beautiful, radiant, dare he even think it-sexy, perfect, gorgeous...

"Uh..."

"You hate it, don't you?" Kairi said, frowning.

Sora frowned back. "No-I think you look...great!"

Kairi scrutinized her appearance in her full length mirror. "It makes me look fat, doesn't it."

Sora rolled his eyes, his powers of articulacy momentarily returning. "Kai, you weight all of 100 pounds. Clothes do not exist that could make you look fat."

Kairi frowned at her reflection once more before turning back to Sora. "I want your honest opinion. Does this outfit say, 'Elegant Princess of Heart' or 'Strong, no-nonsense, Keyblade wielding warrior'?"

"Um,"

Kairi frowned. "I look like a Princess of Heart, don't I?" she stated, before Sora even had a chance to formulate a response.

"Well-"

"Perfect!" she stated sarcastically, "I keep ending up looking like a princess, instead of a knight. No bad guy is ever going to take me seriously unless I stop looking so much like a prissy, helpless, damsel-in-distress, pretty-pretty princess!"

"Actually-"

"Wait, maybe that's it!" Kairi interrupted, "If I don't look like a threat, no one will take me seriously. If no one takes me seriously, they'll underestimate me, and let their guard down because they'll think I'm a pushover! It's perfect!"

"Uh-"

"Thanks Sora!" Kairi told him, grinning widely.

"But-"

"I'm going to show my parents," Kairi chirped, "I knew you'd be able to help." She leaned forward and pecked him on the cheek. "Thanks again!" And off she went, prancing away to show off her new battle clothes.

Sora just sat there in a daze for a few minutes, trying to figure out exactly what he had done to get thanked for.

_fini_

* * *

A/N: The illustration is of Kairi's outfit, by the way. I wanted to have it drawn first so I would have a clear image to write the description from. I'm a designer, what can I say? Coming up with clothing ideas is what I do. Don't forget to check the drawing out by following the link on my profile. The line "Every day is a fashion show, every road is a runway." is my philosophy concerning clothes. Who cares who's going to see me? I don't dress up for other people. I dress up for me. It's the reason I wear earrings to go walking, and refuse to wear tee-shirts and sweatpants even to Wal-mart. Like Kairi, I consider myself sensible in a great many areas, so I reserve the right to be unreasonable about something.

By the way, my 8 year old cousin came over sunday and played the first part of KH2. She has declared that Roxas's name is now officially Hottie McHot-Hot. I found that hysterical. Not that I disagree... She fell in love with those blue eyes.


	16. Wooable and Feet

**A/N: I'M SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO UPDATE!! I've had Woo-able written for half the summer, but I started hating it, so I didn't want to post it and I couldn't get anything else written. I've got about five different one-shots half-done but I can't seem to finish them. I'm quite busy, and ideas aren't coming as often as they used to, so updates won't be very frequent. Sorry... Anyway, this one is a double feature, and then I'm going to post another chapter right after this. Suggestions are appreciated. :)**

Disclaimer: Yeah, because Squeenix is owned by a seventeen-year-old high school art student who still doesn't have her driver's license.

* * *

_Woo-able_

"Is _that_ Sora?"

"Mm-hm." Kairi hummed in confirmation. Her friends stared at her.

"Kairi," a girl with short, choppy black hair demanded, "How long has Sora been this…well, hot?"

Kairi grinned. "I dunno, but I must say, I think that year away from home did him at least _some _good."

"So…" Penelo drawled, nudging Kairi's shoulder, "Are you two dating yet, or what?"

Kairi blushed spectacularly and shook her head. "Oh, no, no, no! W-we're just friends." She stuttered. Penelo and Selphie, both knowing Kairi better, shook their heads. Some of the other girls seemed to believe her though. The girl with black hair, Mina, suddenly attained a smug smile.

"So," she began, "If you and Sora are just friends, then that means he's up for grabs, right?"

Kairi frowned. "Well, not exactly…"

Mina smirked. "Why? I mean, if you aren't interested in him, then you shouldn't mind if I _am_, right?"

"Er…" Kairi nervously flipped her hair over her shoulder, "Well, I _do_ mind, but as Sora's best friend I have a say as to who he dates." She explained as matter-of-factly as she could manage.

Mina rolled her eyes. "Oh, sure. Well then, you know me, so you shouldn't mind me dating Sora."

Kairi laughed. "Uh, no." she scoffed.

Mina's eyes narrowed. "So, you _are _interested in him?"

Kairi shook her head. "No! I just…don't think you're his type, that's all."

Mina frowned. "And you _are_?"

Kairi blushed. "That's not what I meant. I know him well enough to know what kind of girl he's into. Nothing personal, I just don't think you're his type."

Mina frowned. "We'll see about that. I think that's up to Sora to decide." She turned to look at the group of boys standing several yards across the courtyard. Mina cleared her throat. "Oh, Sora!" She called sweetly, "Over here!"

Sora looked away from his friends toward the source of the voice. "Hi!" he called cheerfully, totally oblivious to the flirtatious quality of Mina's greeting.

"It's good to have you back!"

"Um, thanks!"

"I mean, it's _really _great to have you back!" Mina called, smiling coyly.

Sora raised an eyebrow. "Thanks!"

"Hey, are you coming to the end-of-summer Luau dance this Friday?"

"Uh…" Sora threw a confused glance at his friends, as if to say, "Why is she still talking to me? I don't even know her that well." But this is Sora, and being friendly is just what he does. "I dunno."

"Well, it's going to be great!" Mina continued, smiling wider and flipping her short hair. "I'm on student council, and I helped plan it, so I know it's gonna be great! Promise you'll come, all right! It's not a party without a hero!"

"Uh, sure!" Sora called back, still very much oblivious and confused.

"Great! See you there!" Mina shouted, finishing up with a flirty grin.

"Okay!" Sora replied, before returning his attention to his friends with a subtle murmur of "What was _that _about?"

Mina continued the flirty attitude until Sora had turned away, then she promptly replaced it with a very smug smile. "I think he liked me."

Kairi frowned and narrowed her eyes. Normally Kairi was very passive and she prefered to simply turn the other cheek, but this girl had crossed a line. She shoved her bag into Selphie's hands. "Hold this." She ran her fingers through her hair and then stared Mina down. "Watch and learn." Kairi turned and started walking toward Sora and his group of friends, her shapely hips swinging as she walked.

Smiling, she greeted Sora as she approached. "Hey Sora!" she grinned at him as he turned to look at her.

"Hey Kai!" He replied, grinning his special Kairi grin. "What's up?"

"Well…Sora," Kairi groaned, looking at his tie, which was pitifully hanging from his collar, having been pulled at until it was in a pathetically messy state. "I know you hate ties, but really…" Sora gave her an apologetic smile. Kairi merely rolled her eyes and stepped closer to fix Sora's tie. "If you hate these things so much, why don't you just find a clip-on tie?"

Sora shrugged. "Seems like a waste of time to go shopping just for a tie." Kairi rolled her eyes again. She smiled up at Sora. "Well, then, it's settled, you'll come with me when I go shopping this weekend, and I'll get you a clip-on tie while we're there."

Sora groaned. "Kairi, I don't want a go shopping with you! I always end up having to carry everything while you try on a million different outfits!" Kairi finished tying his tie and looked up with bambi-eyes and a pouty lip.

"Please? I just need to stop by the mall for a few things. We can get you a tie, and then maybe we'll see a movie or something while we're there. I promise I won't spend _all day _shopping…Please?" Kairi stuck out her bottom lip further as she pleaded.

"Well," Sora scratched the back of his head.

"But Sora," Tidus began, interrupting Kairi's pout. "We were going to play blitzball this weekend! We were going to have a tournament, remember?"

Sora frowned. "Oh, right."

Kairi's face fell. "Well, if you've already got plans…" Sora's heart sunk at the disappointment on Kairi's face. She'd really been hoping to spend some time with him. He looked back at his friends and shot them a pleading look. They exchanged glances.

"Well," Riku started, sighing in resignation. "It would be nice not to have to listen to Sora complain about his tie all the time."

"Yeah, I guess it'd be alright if you missed part of the tournament." Vaan supplied, winking at Sora, who mouthed "Thank you" in reply.

Kairi brightened up significantly. She flipped her crimson hair over her shoulder. "Great!" she said, grinning, which, in turn, made Sora grin. "Oh, by the way," she said suddenly, placing her hands on her hips. "I didn't see you at the island yesterday. Did you have a lot of work to do?" What Sora knew she wanted to say was, "Do you have a good excuse for breaking our promise?"

Sora smiled apologetically. "Yeah…sorry."

Kairi shrugged. "No big deal…I'll see you there today, right?" she asked, smiling through her thick eyelashes.

It would have been physically, mentally, emotionally, and scientifically impossible for Sora to say no to that face even if he'd wanted to. "Of course!"

Kairi grinned widely. "Great. See ya later." She kissed her pointer and middle finger and then brushed them against Sora's cheek.

The other girls watched as Kairi turned to walk back towards them as Sora dazedly fell over backward into his friends' arms. Kairi grinned smugly at them and raised her eyebrows at Mina, as if to say, "How do you like _them _apples?"

She didn't look back at Sora, who she knew was still struggling to regain his balance, as he smiled goofily in her direction.

The other girls gawked at the casual air and finesse with which Kairi had pulled the whole thing off. It was like she wasn't even trying. Kairi smirked at Mina as she took her bag from Selphie.

"Like I said," she explained to Mina, "You're not his type."

_fini_

* * *

_Feet_

_(Sora's POV)_

Forget the gutter.

Someone needs to call the fire department or something to haul Selphie's mind out of the sewers.

I say this because of what she said this afternoon. See, it was after school, and I was going to find Kairi so I could walk her home like a good boyfriend should, when I saw her and Selphie talking. They were talking really quietly, and standing kind of close together, which all seemed point to them having one of those private, girls-only, Sora-don't-come-near-us-until-we're-done-talking-because-you're-not-supposed-to-hear-any-of-our-conversation conversations. So I just stood a couple of yards away while they finished up their conversation.

You could tell that Selphie had initiated the conversation because whatever she was saying kept making Kairi swat at her and give her this look like, 'don't _say_ that!'. Finally, the conversation ended, and Kairi started to walk towards me.

I don't even want to _know_ what they were talking about, because the next words out of Selphie's mouth were:

"Hey Kairi, you know what they say about guys with big feet!"

**Oh God.**

Kairi and I just pretended that Selphie hadn't said anything.

end

* * *

A/N: 'Feet' was inspired by a comic I found on DeviantArt. I don't usually write first-person, because too often it sounds much too formal; first person should be written the way people actually think.


	17. Privacy

**A/N: The promised second update in a day. I'm going to bed now.**

Disclaimer: Yes. I do. I totally do.

* * *

_Privacy_

"Selphie, for the last time, we're not fighting."

Selphie gave Kairi an exasperated sigh. "Well, you're not talking, either."

This last part certainly seemed to be true. Sora and Kairi had been saying as little as possible to each other for the last few days, and it had been driving Selphie crazy not knowing what it was. Kairi still maintained that it was not a fight, as she was at this moment as she and Selphie walked down the crowded school hallways. The school day had just ended, so the hallways were still packed with people gathering their things and preparing to leave.

"It's just a spat, really," Kairi insisted, rolling her eyes at her friend. "It'll blow over in a few days."

Selphie sighed again. "I don't see how it's gonna blow over if you two don't say anything to each other!" Kairi decided that there was simply no winning with Selphie and therefore she fell into silence as Selphie babbled on. "What class does Sora have at the end of the day, anyway?" Selphie asked, the devious glint in her eye going unnoticed by Kairi.

"P.E." Kairi told her, "He's probably still in the locker room. Since they have it at the end of the day, those guys take _forever _to get dressed. They don't care to hurry at all since they don't have another class to get to."

"Do they now…" Selphie's green eyes were still glinting dangerously.

They were passing by the locker rooms when Selphie suddenly gasped. "Oh my gosh!"

Kairi stopped. "What?"

Suddenly Selphie lunged, opening the door to the boys' locker room and shoving Kairi in, holding the door shut behind her.

Kairi stumbled into the locker room, squealing at the sudden movement. When the motion stopped and Kairi found herself staring at the door, she finally had a second to try and open it, only to realize that Selphie was holding it shut. Kairi scowled and turned around to survey her surroundings. Twenty-something half-dressed males stared back at her. Kairi spun back around to the door and shouted frantically. "SELPHIE, LET ME OUT OF HERE _**NOW**_!!"

"K-Kairi?" Kairi froze. She knew that voice. She knew that voice better than she knew her own. She'd recognize it anywhere. She started to turn to look at him, but then the half-naked men started to enter her peripheral vision, and she decided she rather enjoyed looking at the door.

"H-hi Sora," she said in a strangled voice, her already beet-red face getting redder.

"Kairi, you do know that this is the _boys' _locker room, don't you?"



"Um, yeah…I'm painfully aware of that…Selphie pushed me in…and, um…she won't let me out."

There was silence for a moment. "Is Selphie aware that this is the boys' locker room?"

"Yeah...she did this on purpose, Sora."

More silence. "Why?"

Kairi gave a frustrated sigh. "I don't know! But this is the part where you're supposed to help me in some way!"

Sora's arm reached around her and yanked on the door handle. It didn't budge, but a chorus of giggles replied from the other side. Clearly Selphie had enlisted plenty of help. "Selphie!" Sora called, "Let Kairi out!"

"Not until you two make up!"

Kairi rolled her eye. "Selphie!"

"Kiss and make up and then I'll let you out!"

"Selphie, eventually the boys are going to need to get out of here too!"

"Then make up!"

Kairi growled in aggravation. "Fine! Sora, I'm sorry. There! Can I leave now!?"

"Did you look him in the eye when you said it?"

Kairi narrowed her eyes. This was getting ridiculous. "Looking him in the eye right now would kind of mean facing a room full of half-naked guys, Selphie!"

"Too bad! Look him in the eye and make up and then we'll let you out!"

More than ridiculous. As soon as she got out of here, Kairi was going Selphie-hunting. "Fine! I'm looking at him now." Lie. "I'm sorry, Sora."

"Did you look him in the eye as you said it?"

No. "Yes! Now let me out!!"

"Sora still hasn't apologized!"

Kairi could practically hear Sora's eyes rolling. "I'm sorry, Kairi."

"Did you look her in the eyes?" No.



"Yes!"

"Okay, then, now you can come out!"

"Finally…" Kairi sighed, thoroughly fed up with the whole affair. Suddenly she felt Sora's hands on her shoulders and his lips beside her ear as he whispered to her. She smiled at his words.

Kairi glared at Selphie as she finally exited the locker room. Selphie was giggling at her, and looking smug. "See, that wasn't so b-" Suddenly Selphie's world was spinning as Kairi grabbed her arms and spun her around and through the door which Sora held open just long enough for Selphie to make it into the guys' locker room. Kairi grabbed the handle and held it shut on her end as Sora leaned up against it, holding it closed on his end.

"KAIRI, SORA, LET ME OUT!!"

"Hey, babe?" Kairi heard Sora call through the heavy wood door.

"Yeah?"

"How long shall we keep her in here? Until the guys finish getting dressed?"

Kairi grinned mischievously. "If it's okay with them!"

Well, Kairi had to give Selphie one thing, she and Sora were talking again.

End

* * *

A/N: Reviews are nice. I dunno when the next update will be. Probably after the musical. I'm the costume director for the fall musical this year, so I'll be pretty busy until mid-November.

I'm going to bed now. Tis late.


	18. Phenomenon

**AN: See, I'm neither dead nor guilty of abandonement. I've simply been buried under a pile of fabric, hot glue, rayon, hangers, and overdue homework (that didn't get done b/c I was too busy being eaten by fabric) to do anything that wasn't of the utmost importance. So now that I'm done costuming a full-scale broadway musical on a small private school's budget. So I've got a good three months worth of pent-up storylines to find the time to write. This is probably all I'll have time for until after exams, which end wednesday. Wow...I've only got one semester of high school left.......that's scary, to say the least.**

**This was inspired by something my mother (who teaches 9th grade Algebra) told be about one of her classes. I thought it was hilarious.**

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, in the last three months of my hiatus, I didn't come up with any clever new ways to say "I don't own it".**

_Phenomenon_

A curious phenomenon was taking place in Mr. Brojevi's 5th period 10th grade Geometry class.

Students are creatures of habit, of this he was certain, even after so few years teaching. They would whine, and complain, and groan until the cows came home if you gave them a seating chart, but you knew the apocalypse was nigh if they didn't sit in the exact same seat every single day if you didn't.

This particular class had been forced to change their habitual seating arrangement by the addition of another classmate mid-October. An 11th grade girl, Kairi Hikari, had been moved into his class to retake the first semester (having failed her own first semester of Geometry the previous year—due, he had heard, to the mysterious disappearance of her two best friends, or a temporary bout of insanity, depending on who you talked to). He assumed that the sudden mass migration to the seats in the front left corner was because the newest member of the class had taken someone else's seat, and that had set off a chain reaction of everyone else trying to re-find the seat that was perfect for them.

Although, the new seating arrangement wasn't the only thing that had changed recently; the most apathetic boys were trying so much harder to insure that they were the first the shout out the right answer. It was all rather strange.

Then one day, Kairi came in late because of a doctor's appointment, and sat in the far left, front row seat—the opposite side of the room from her normal seat.

Suddenly, all of the males in the room found themselves plagued by a rather vision-restricting glare on the whiteboard which they could only avoid by relocating to far left side of room.

It occurred to Mr. Brojevi later that day that Kairi Hikari was apparently very good-looking.

* * *

AN: Sorry it's so short, but it's all I have time for right now. Calculus exam Monday...oh boy. (That was drowning in sarcasm, by the way.)

1. Brojevi is apparently Croation for "numbers". Cool sounding word, isn't it?

2. This new sophmore girl was put into one of mom's 9th grade algebra classes. Apparently she's really pretty, and suddenly all the boys who used to sit in the back of the class and do nothing have decided to change seats....

I found that hilarious. I'm so tired. That English AP exam this morning fried my brains. Review and tell me what you think. **I want to remind everyone that this is NOT a continuous story--it is merely a collection of oneshots. There's pretty much no continuity.**

* * *


	19. Trouble is Orange

**A/N: Yes, it is about time for an update, I know. I've been busy. I have to have 24 artworks done and turned in to the AP college board by May 8. I have, like, six of the breadth (12 pieces) and only 2 concentration (other 12 pieces). Point being: I'll update when I graduate. Seriously, with two AP exams to prepare for, and an AP art portfolio to finish (the 24 pieces), plus the rest of my work, I probably won't have time to update ANYTHING until this summer.**

**I digress, on with the show.**

**Disclaimer: I own a car I can finally legally drive by myself. But I don't own Kingdom Hearts. Sadly.**

_Trouble is Orange_

_Bbbbrrrrriiiiiiiinnnnnggggg._

The lavender and cerulean striped alarm clock is permitted to flash "9:53" one last time before a cluster of flowers in the shape of key comes smashing down upon it, crushing the machinery beyond repair. (AN1)

_Bbbbrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggg._

Kairi groans as the ringing continued, and her half-awake mind manages to grasp the concept that it is not in fact her alarm clock which is making the noise. Still resolutely intending to go back to sleep, she doesn't bother to open her eyes as she rolls over and begins blindly feeling around on her bedside table for her phone. She finally manages to locate it, and pulls it over to her ear.

"Hello?" she mumbles groggily.

_Bbbrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggg._

Kairi yanks the phone away from her ear and opens her eyes long enough to angrily mash the "TALK" button.

"I hate you."

"_Yesterday you said you loved me."_

"Yeah, well, I changed my mind. I hate you," Kairi grumbles, still not fully awake, and in no mood for her boyfriend's optimism this early in the morning.

"_Oh, come on, Kairi, what's your deal? You're usually up early!"_

"Sora…"Kairi groans, wanting nothing more than to roll over and go back to sleep, "I'm still catching up on the sleep I lost writing my history paper."

"_Well, you shouldn't have procrastinated."_

"I'm mentally strangling you right now. _You _procrastinated! I helped _you _write _your _history paper, and then I had to go home and stay up finishing mine! Now I'm going back t'sleep…" As Kairi loses her ranting momentum she burrows deeper into her blankets, and finishes her statement by tossing the phone across the room.

She is almost asleep when, _"And even when all hope is gone, move along, move along just to make it through…"_

Kairi moans into her pillow at the sound of the custom ringtone Sora had set to play on her cell phone when he called. "Stupid boyfriend with his stupid emo skater boy music…" She drags herself out of bed and digs her cell-phone out of her purse. (AN: No offense--I actually like this song. Kairi's just grumpy.)

"What?" she asks, still half-asleep, and still very unhappy.

"_What do you know about Punkin Chunkin?"_

Kairi rubs her eyes, finally resigning herself to the world of the living. Sora won't give up, and Kairi knows this. "What?" She asks again, more in genuine curiosity than simple aggravated desire to hear what he had to say and then go back to bed.

She can practically hear Sora's excited grin through the phone line. Kairi sits on the edge of her bed and rubs at her eyes, yawning as she listens to Sora's enthusiastic reply. _"Punkin Chunkin! You know, like, pumpkin tossing on steroids."_

Kairi closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. She had been friends with Sora and Riku long enough to know where this was going. "Pumpkin…tossing…" She takes another deep breath, blowing crimson tassels out of her eyes. "Of course…"

"_But Kairi, seriously, you gotta hear me out on this one!"_

"Sora, before you say anything else on this one, is it legal? Because, I gotta tell you, that wasn't fun running from the police when you and Riku--"

"_It's totally legal." _Kairi wants to believe him. And she figures that even if he was lying, experience tells her that ignorance is most likely bliss when it comes to anything Sora and Riku are up too. _"Anyway, long story short," _Kairi prepares herself for what would, in fact, be a long story delivered at record breaking speeds so as to take up as a little time as it would had she actually been given the promised short summary.

"_So, I was watching the Science Channel, I don't remember why at first, but _then," the excitement and anticipation in his voice heightens and the already speedy delivery accelerates, _"this show came on called 'Punkin Chunkin', about the National Punkin Chunkin competition, where people build these giant trebuchets and air cannons and catapults and see who can fling a pumpkin the farthest!" _Kairi blinks, trying to discern if she had actually heard what she thinks she had heard, or if her auditory discretion had been confused by the one continuous noise coming out of Sora's mouth. _"It was so cool! The world record from the air cannon, is like, almost a mile! And I know that obviously it's way too much to try to build an air cannon, but catapults aren't that hard to make, so Riku and I were thin-"_

"Oh no." Kairi is already massaging away the "this won't end well" thoughts knotting in her temples. "_Please _don't tell me you two are thinking what I think you're thinking."

"_That depends on what you think we're thinking."_

"Sora, if I come out to the island, am I going to find a half-built catapult in construction on the beach?"

There is a guilty silence on the other line.

"Sora…."

"……"

"You two are actually planning to fling pumpkins into the ocean?!"

"_You know what, Kairi, never mind, I should let you get your sleep."_

"Oh, no, don't you try to get out of this, how far have you two planned this? How big are you trying to build? I've heard bad accidents that have happened with big catapults and things like that! What are--?"

"_No, never mind, you need your sleep, bye Kairi!"_

"Don't you dare hang up on me!"

"…"

"Sora…"

"_Well…I wouldn't say _half _built…"_

"That's it. I'm coming out there before you two get yourselves killed."

…&…

"Oh…wow." Words of reprimanding, of amazement, of trepidation, and of frustration fly to her mouth but all crashed into a four-car-pile-up of language before reaching her lips and escape as nothing but stray breaths and noises.

"Yeah…" Sora articulates slowly, rubbing the back of his neck. He stands before a catapult, as she had suspected, already partially completed, and a pile of white pumpkins ("They hold up better when you fling 'em." As she had just been informed.)

"We figured out a way to do this safely, there's no need to worry."

"K'hah!" Kairi manages to articulate. 'K'hah!', it must be noted, was originally "Sure, yeah right!" but got a little garbled on the way out.

Sora merely chuckles and pats her on the back, knowing that eventually she'd come around; spend ten minutes telling them they were morons; realize that she'd been telling them they were morons for the last eleven years and it hadn't slowed the stupidity any; and simply sit down and enjoy the show.

At least they had a tradition.

"So…pumpkins…." Kairi drawls about a half hour later, watching bemusedly as her boys put the finishing touches on their impromptu gourd flinger. "Why pumpkins, d'you think?" Sora turns to look at her as she twirls a strand of hair around her finger and examines it idly; checking for split ends that she would never find. Deciding she's being left out a bit (and that if Riku could brag about his muscles, he could do the bigger share of the work), Sora drops the hammer he'd been using to pound nails further than necessary into the woodwork and comes to join her underneath the palm tree she'd commandeered as her throne.

"Why not pumpkins?" He asks, shrugging; albeit with one arm, as the other is slipping around Kairi's shoulders. "Or punkins, actually, as the punkin chunkin purists insist."

"When you run out of punkins, you can just put me in the catapult and fling me into the ocean," Kairi tells him, smiling mischievously.

Sora frowns. "Huh?"

"Well, you could if you had ever called me punkin."

Sora gives her a half-laugh and rolls his eyes. "That was a really bad joke, Kairi."

"S'your fault."

"How's it my fault? You're the one who made the joke."

Kairi purses her lips and mumbles through her pout, "You're the one that never called me punkin."

Sora leans closer to her. "Punkin."

Kairi smiles a little and lets her eyelashes droop. "See, now it makes sense."

Sora simply smiles and kisses her gently.

"Hey, I could use some help over here! Flirt on your own time!"

Kairi grabs his hand and pulls away enough to murmur, "Flip him off and I'm breaking up with you." (AN2)

…&…

"I don't know about this…" Kairi stares at the slipshod wooden monstrosity standing on the beach in front of her. "Are you sure this is legal?"

She receives a hesitant answer.

"Are you sure this is safe?"

This time she doesn't receive an answer at all.

The white canvas of a sailboat passing by a little more than a hundred yards off the coast of their small island catches Kairi's attention. "Boys," she calls to Sora and Riku, who are placing the first punkin (consecrated with a sharpie drawing of Ansem's face) into its cradle of death. "It's not going to go far enough to hit that boat, is it?"

Riku pulls a few wrinkled sheets of notebook paper from his back pocket and examines them. "Nope, not according to my calculations. It should land in the water _way_ closer to the island."

Kairi can't figure out why, but she can't help feeling that this isn't going to end well. Of course, she got this feeling when it came to most of Sora and Riku's hair brained schemes, so she had gotten good at ignoring the premonitions.

"Ready,"

Kairi takes a step back from her already distant position behind a palm tree. _Please don't get anyone arrested._

"Aim," She is momentarily relieved by this order; one made clearly for show as there was no aiming to be done. _Please don't get anyone injured…_

"Fire!!!" Sora's silver and blue keyblade comes flying through the air from behind his safety tree and slashes the rope holding the catapult ready, sending the arm arching forward and the white "punkin" flying gracefully through the air.

Only it keeps flying. Far past where Riku predicted it would land. And it flies all the way to the crisp white sails of the sailboat, where it splatters into the mast, rocking the tiny vessel.

The three kids stare, horrorstruck, at the small boat for a few moments; their brains kicking in as they noticed that the people on the boat appear to be pointing straight at their catapult. Then they notice that the ship was moving—and towards their island no less.

"I don't think they're happy." Sora notes astutely.

"I told you so!" Kairi screeches, glaring at her friends. "I thought you said the pumpkin wouldn't go that far!"

Riku hastily whips his calculations out of his pocket again. "I didn't think it would! The numbers say it should've gone--" He leaves off as Kairi grabs the papers from his hands and scans the scribbled numbers.

She closes her eyes and takes a shaky breath. Letting it out as slowly as she can, she says in a forced calm, "Riku, you subtracted where you should have added." Her eyes open to glare at him; the paper in her hand being crumpled as her dainty hand turns into a dainty fist.

Faintly they hear, "Hey! You kids!"

The paper slips from Kairi's grasp and onto the ground. Sora, Kairi, and Riku stare at each other for a moment, before Sora finally takes the initiative to yell, "Run!"

It doesn't matter where to; all that matters at this moment is that they get as far as humanly possible away from that catapult before some very unhappy boaters arrive on the beach.

They take off around the island, heading for the door that would take them from the cove where they had decided to build and the main beach of the island where they might be able to board their small rowboats and head for the main island.

"Wait up!" Kairi pants as they rush across the rickety bridge, "I can't run as fast as you two!"

Riku looks back at her, "Well, you know what they say; you don't have to outrun the bear; you just have to outrun your slowest friend!"

Kairi's eyes grow wide. "If you leave me behind I'm squealing like a pig!!!"

Sora and Riku pause at the door to the main beach and look at each other, then at Kairi. "You won't tell. You wouldn't."

Kairi stops in front of them and glares. "Like a _pig_."

She is then promptly hoisted onto her friends' shoulders and carried thusly to the Secret Place, where the gang thereafter elected to hide.

end

AN 1: This scenario has been in my head forever, in a million different beginnings of a million different storylines. Usually, though, it's Sora. Anyway, glad I finally found somewhere to use it.

AN2: The cutest version of this scenario was forced to stay in my head for so long that by the time I got to put it on paper, I'd forgotten it. I kinda had to go on what I oculd remember, but it isn't flowing the way it did at one point...

I changed tenses in this so many times...So if there are some inconsistencies, that's why. Yeah, I saw something on tv last fall about Punkin Chunkin, and was like, "Sora and Riku would so try that, and Kairi would be sitting there like, 'You idiots'. I should write a fic about it!" There's probably more to say about this, but I'm tired. Yay.

In other news, Sunny, 8 months past being 17, finally has her driver's license. Yayz.


	20. Unsaid

**A/N: Yay! Finally time for update! Unfortunately it's short. Sorry, but hopefully you'll like it anyway. Based on the classic scenario of saying something without being aware of it...sorta. Tee hee hee! Tried to go for a more dialogue based style, since it fit the theme, but I think I kinda failed. Heeeey, first update as a high school graduate!!! (with an 4 in AP Art and another 4 in AP English!--that's REALLY good, for those who don't know.)**

**Disclaimer: Read the above statement, I don't need to own it.**

* * *

_Unsaid_

Late afternoon, but still a couple hours before sunset, warm sunlight bathes the beach in calm energy. Kairi lays beside him on the sand, eyes closed, school tie, clogs and knee-socks abandoned somewhere near her feet, and the sunlight illuminating her gentle curves, her beauty undiminished by the school uniform she hasn't changed out of yet.

Sora is happy her eyes are closed, because he wouldn't be able to get away with staring at her so blatantly otherwise. He sits in the warm sand, a little stuffy in his collared shirt, but too content to be basking in Kairi's presence to blame her for dragging him off to the island without giving him enough time to run home and change out of his school uniform.

But that's okay. This is right where he wants to be, sitting in the sand and marveling at how long, and lean, and elegant Kairi has become. And in this light, she looks positively angelic.

Suddenly those long ebony lashes sweep back and circles of the sea are staring at him.

Sora's face pales.

"Oh, please don't tell me I said that out loud."

Gently arching crimson brows narrow. "You didn't say anything."

Relief washes over Sora as he simultaneously kicks himself for turning a totally casual moment into one of panic and awkwardness.

"Why?"

Or maybe not.

"What?"

He notices Kairi hasn't stopped looking at him.

"What were you going to say?"

Sora blushes.

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"Yeah."

Pause.

"What was it you didn't want to say?"

Sora is feeling hot under the collar.

"N-nothing. It's not important."

"Then tell me what it was."

"No."

"Why not?"

"…because."

"Well, it is bad, or something?"

"No! I mean, it's not---"

"Because if it was something bad or dirty or something that I just don't wanna know, then okay, whatever."

"No! It wasn't anything bad!"

"Then tell me."

"Kairi, it doesn't matter, really."

"Then _tell _me."

Her eyes are set; she is not giving up. She could keep this up all afternoon.

"I was thinking that you look like an angel."

Silence. Shocked, not awkward.

When Sora finally gets the nerve to look back at Kairi, he notices that it isn't the sun that's tinted her cheeks pink.

"Thank you." Her voice quavers out, scarcely above a whisper. She then looks away, smiling slightly, and Sora is left being capable of doing nothing but grin in relief.

Kairi goes back to lying in the sand, eyes closed, and Sora returns to staring at her, although he's fairly certain that this time, she's aware of it.

fin

* * *

**A/N: Had this idea whilst rereading one of my own fics. You know, it's classic: Someone says something, 'did I say that outloud?' 'yeah' but it's okay, cuz it's touching. Well, what happens when you DON'T say anything, but think you have. One way or another, it's gonna get said. **


	21. Glee

**A/N: FINALLY THEY LET ME UPLOAD THIS!!! I've been trying for two days and I keep getting a "Processing Error" message. Ugh. So annoying.**

ANYWHO: This is expanding on an idea I first posed in my oneshot "Dirt"--that Kairi was a cheerleader only because she was the only girl at their school who could do a decent back-hand-spring. (I used to be able to do one of those, btw. Keyword:used to, but still.) I should mention that I am in no way trying to make fun of cheerleaders. I am simply expounding upon the idea that not all of us have the peppyness and energy to be one. Goodness knows I don't. The fact that Kairi is the only gymnast on their school's team should tell you somehting about the quality of their school's particular cheer squad, not cheerleaders in general.

**_BY THE WAY, I'M HOSTING A CONTEST! SEE MY PROFILE FOR FULL DETAILS!!!_**

* * *

_Glee_

The pep rally hasn't even started yet and Sora is already trying not to laugh. Not that Sora particularly likes pep rallies; on the contrary, he thinks they are rather ridiculous. He is aware that the purpose of these events are to rally school spirit and all that jazz, and he thinks that they could even have the potential to be fun, if done properly. However, Hibiscus County High School is not renowned for its pep rallies being very good at accomplishing this goal.

However, Sora considers these pep rallies to be particularly entertaining because of a certain redhead who is currently sulking in the corner of the gymnasium with the other cheerleaders, and, from the look of it, contemplating gagging herself with her own pom-pom. Or perhaps she is contemplating how she could shove the pom-pom down the cheer captain's throat and still get away with it even though it would be in front of a gym full of witnesses.

One way or another, she looks like she wants to strangle someone.

Everyone is seated, so the band starts playing to serenade the cheerleaders' entrance onto the main floor of the gym. As the cheerleaders take center stage to begin whatever spirit-infused routine they have planned for today, the band trails off rather awkwardly. Kairi pins on a plastic smile and falls in place shaking pom-poms and putting her arms in whatever angle is required for each syllable of "Let's go DOLPHINS!"

This is about when Sora loses it; he chokes back the laughter, of course, since it would be neither kind nor indicative of sanity for him to burst out laughing in the middle of these teenage girls' moment of stardom.

He watches Kairi's eyes look his way, and he nearly suffocates trying not laugh as she manufactures an eye twitch. They have finished the regular rah-rah-rah routine with one last bit of free-form individual jumping up and down and screaming. Kairi just sort of bounces on the balls of her feet, clapping her hands a little. Next they move on to the part where they start standing on each other's shoulders.

All except for Kairi, who has started doing various flips and other feats of gymnastics across the floor as the other girls hold up signs and try to get the student body to yell a little louder.

He watches the other cheerleaders start to rearrange, and it doesn't escape his notice that Selphie nearly falls flat on her face due to a certain redhead purposefully back-flipping across her path.

He takes it that Kairi hasn't forgiven her then.

It started innocently enough—Selphie complaining that since Ashe had graduated, the team was out girls who could do much more than cartwheel—then Kairi casually mentioned that she'd done gymnastics for several years when she was younger.

Next thing she knew—drafted.

Not that Kairi wasn't bubbly or spirited; she just didn't have the kind of peppy nature required of a cheerleader. She just wasn't hyper enough. Of course, it didn't help that she could care less about whether or not the Blitz Ball team made it to Regional's. She didn't care how the football team played; why should she care if the school was pepped up for the game?

But when the school offered to let the cheer squad count as a Physical Education credit, thereby getting her out of her current—and very much despised—P.E. class, she'd decided that maybe cheerleading was the lesser of two evils.

However, it turned out to be even worse, and as she quickly discovered, the Hibiscus County High School Cheerleading Squad was like Hotel California—you check in, but you don't check out.

It had been really funny her first pep rally, when she'd still been steaming over being forced onto the team. She'd complied like a good little girl up until the human pyramid, when she had simply sat down cross-legged on the floor with her arms crossed, flat out refusing to take her part on the pyramid. The other girls, not knowing what else to do, had attempted to make the pyramid without her.

Frankly, it was a miracle no one got seriously injured.

Kairi had actually felt a little guilty about it; at least until she saw the video—then she just thought it was funny.

Of course, the next day when the Cheer coach made a speech to the school saying that the whole thing had been planned as a skit to show what happens when one part of a team doesn't support the rest and that therefore the whole school must stand together as one, Kairi just abandoned all guilt and set about spreading the word that she'd done it on purpose.

They've stopped doing acrobatics and started dancing. At least, it's supposed to be dancing. In all actuality it's just a lot of angling arms different ways and shaking hips in ways that really don't seem appropriate for high school.

And now Kairi just looks bored. Not that Sora can blame her. The 'dancing' that these girls are doing is cripplingly simple compared to what Kairi thinks of as dancing. After all, she's had what, Sora thinks, ten, eleven years of ballet? Plus eight years of tap dancing.

She'd played Clara in the Nutcracker; her tap dancing got her lead roles in the local community theatre three years and running. As well as lead roles in school musicals since she was twelve. As far as dancing goes she'd been considered a prodigy. A director at the Destiny Islands Ballet had let slip to her that the directors had high hopes to cast her as the Sugar Plum Fairy in a few years. No wonder she looks bored.

Finally the 'dancing' ends and the pom-pom waving resumes. One more attempt to get the student body to look excited about the big game tonight and the light-blue and white clad energy fountains are done. The first of the fall sports coaches takes the floor to start introducing this year's football team members and the cheerleaders are allowed to resume sitting with their friends.

Sora's sure he's ruptured something trying to hold back the laughter by the time Kairi finally makes it to where he is sitting. She tiredly plops down beside him and gives him a look that displays all her aversions to the sport she is forced to take part in. A sport that could keep her from participating in this year's school musical, Kairi doesn't mind pointing out—although she's not particularly worried about that. The cheer coach won't let her quit the squad and the theatre director won't let a bunch of pom-pom waving take away one of her stars. If it comes down to a fight between them, Kairi knows the theatre director will win.

Sora gives her a look of amused pity and wraps an arm around her shoulders.

"Kill me now," Kairi mutters bitterly.

"It's not all bad," Sora murmurs back.

Kairi raises a questioning eyebrow. Sora grins cheekily, ignoring the part of his brain that tells him he's going to get slapped for saying this.

"You look great in the mini-skirt."

_gimme an _**E **_gimme a_** N **_gimme a _**D**

* * *

_Disclaimer: I own naught but the name of Sora and Kairi's high school. I've decided that there is probably more than one high school on the islands. Hence theirs being named after their county._

A/N: I've always pictured Kairi as a dancer, but never as a cheerleader. Once again, sorry if I've offended any cheerleaders. Not trying to. Although, the thing about the dancing, I have to say, since I was in the musical Thoroughly Modern Millie, I've never been impressed by my school's cheereleaders' dancing. Maybe that's just our squad, though.

Let me know what you think! I don't think it's one of the best; it came out mostly a character study on Kairi. Constructive criticism is always appreciated!

**DON'T FORGET TO CHECK OUT MY CONTEST ON MY PROFILE!!!**


	22. Scholarly

**A/N: So I've seriously just spent over twelve hours studying for my final exams and my brain is fried and it needed a release before I go to bed to get very few hours of sleep before I have to get up and start studying some more. Oh boy. So this one kinda sucks, but I'm not running on all cylinders right now. I'll update with something decent after finals. **

**Although, I will say this: College finals are a heck of a lot less stressful than highschool exams were.**

**Disclaimer: NO.**

_Scholarly_

Riku knows who it is the second the phone starts ringing. That's why he hesitates.

"_I'm dying."_

They surpassed pleasentries like 'hello' two hours and countless phone calls earlier.

"No you're not."

"_Yes I am! If I try to cram any more of this chemical mumbo-jumbo into my head it's gonna explode."_

Riku sighs and rubs the bridge of his nose. "And?"

"_And? And I'm gonna fail chemistry! I've gotta get _at least _a C on this exam to keep from failing the class, and after six straight hours of studying, I gotta tell you, it's just not gonna happen!"_

"So? Sora that's your own fault. What do you want me to do about it?"

"_I want heeeeelp!"_

"Sora, you don't want help. You want someone to listen to you complain and Kairi stopped answering the phone two hours ago."

"_Well, if you want me to stop complaining, then HELP ME. You took this last year, you could help!"_

"Exactly, I took it a year ago. I don't remember anything. And I've got exams of my own to study for, you know. Call Kairi."

"_She won't answer. That's why I'm calling you. I thought we established that."_

"Sora, do me a favor. Look up 'procrastinating'. I think the definition is something like, 'exactly what you're doing right now'. Quit whining, and go study."

"_But—"_

"Go study, and leave me alone." And Riku flips the phone shut before Sora has a chance to respond. He gives his friend about five minutes before he calls again.

And sure enough, a few minutes later, the small speaker is next to his ear and proclaiming,

"_When I fail, I'm blaming you."_

"Goodbye, Sora."

-----

Twenty minutes later, Riku finds himself realizing that he has been basking in blissful silence for much too long. Still, it's welcome, and much needed considering the amount of knowledge he needed to cram into his own brain before tomorrow, but there was an uneasiness in such an extended reprieve.

Which is why he is not surprised to hear his phone ring. Picking it up and smashing it to his ear Riku declares, "Stop calling me, quit being a baby, and just go study!"

There is a seemingly shocked silence from the other end followed by, _"Riku? Stressed much?"_

Sora has never sounded _that_ feminine in his life. Riku physically sinks a little in his chair in shame. "Sorry Kairi, I thought you were--"

"_Yeah. I know. So I called to ask you something."_

"What?"

"_How do you block someone's number from your phone?"_

* * *

**A/N: Because I am so beyond sick of chemistry at the moment. Ten hours on it today. At least. BLARGH. Like I said, I just needed a release. I'll update with something decent after exams.**


	23. Singleish and Fur

A/N: **I LIVE. Sort of.** I'm sick. Again. I've decided that my immune system went to watch the Olympics. So I'm updating. At 3 in the morning because my sleep schedule is so screwed up. So here we have a **DOUBLE-FEATURE **chapter. The first is inspired by Valentine's Day, and more particularly, **my** Valentine's day, because for the first time in my life I actually had a Valentine, and I was too sick to spend it with him. He did send me chocolate and tulips, though, so it was still pretty good. C: Second part is a **BONUS FIELD-TRIP SPECIAL!**

I don't own squat.

* * *

_Single-ish_

The universe just _loved_ to heap irony upon her, didn't it?

Kairi sneezed, and after wiping her nose added the kleenex to the growing ski mountain of tissues in the garbage can beside her bed. She groaned and collapsed back into her pile of pillows.

"—_where we're showing the love with a non-stop marathon of the most romantic movies of all time! So spend your Valentine's Day here on Lifetime! And---"_

"Bah! That's not where I _want _to be spending my Valentine's Day, thank you very much!" Kairi croaked as she changed the channel. Where she _wanted _to be spending her Valentine's Day was in the arms of a certain keyblade wielder, feeding each other chocolates, or strolling on the beach…

_Not _cooped up in her bed watching mushy movies on the Lifetime channel, courtesy of a faulty immune system.

And _that _was where the irony kicked in. She finally had someone to spend Valentine's Day with, and was too sick to spend it with him.

She felt her cell phone vibrate against her shoulder and looked down to see the screen blinking with an alert for a text message. She coughed and picked up her phone, idly flicking the screen to see a message from Sora.

_**Special valentine's day delivery for Kairi Hikari.**_

Kairi blinked in confusion at the message for a few seconds before she heard the doorbell ring. She listened intently to the sound of her mother's light, quick footsteps walking towards the door, and then the sound of the door opening, followed by a muffled conversation with a voice she didn't recognize, followed by her mother's confused reply. Suddenly there were footsteps, a lot of them, coming through the house, up the stairs, towards her room.

The next thing Kairi knew, her door was being opened and her mother was letting in several strange men carrying armfuls of bouquets of white daisies. Then, to her surprise, they approached her bed, piling the bouquets onto the bed in front of her, until she was almost surrounded by her own weight in white daisies. Then they tipped their hats at her and left. Kairi simply stared at the mountain of daisies in front of her while her mother showed the delivery men out and returned to nod in satisfaction at Kairi's flower mountain.

"Sora did good."

Kairi sneezed.

Her mother frowned. "Sort of."

Kairi sneezed again. She smiled and returned her attention to her phone. The screen started blinking again, indicating a new text message, again from Sora. Kairi opened it and grinned.

_**So? how did i do?**_

Kairi sighed, sneezed, then hit **Reply**, simultaneously sliding out her phone's QWERTY keyboard. She sneezed again, and waved a hand at the flowers sitting before her, and her mother began scooping them up and carrying them out of her room.

_Sora, they're beautiful, but there's just one thing_.

After a moment, _**Really? what?**_

Kairi giggled and sneezed again. Only _Sora's _attempts at romance would go awry like _this._

_I'm allergic to daisies._

_**.**fin._

* * *

**SPECIAL FIELD-TRIP BONUS ONESHOT! Because after 22 and 1/2 chapters of back-at-the-islands, it's time for a field trip!**

**

* * *

**

_Fur_

The Pride Lands. One of Sora's favorite worlds. Nowhere else could he run this fast, leap this far, or get away with being practically naked in public.

He looked around, enjoying the view of the Savannah from his new viewpoint closer to the ground, and turned to see what Donald's magic had done to his two friends.

His gaze first fell to Riku, who had been transformed into a oddly silver lion. Sora noted with chagrin that his friend seemed to have a much fuller mane than he did. He started to look to see where Kairi had landed, when his search was aided by a loud scream. He spun around to see a deep-crimson lioness attempting to walk on her back legs.

"What is this place?" She demanded, and Sora couldn't help but smile at how odd it sounded to hear Kairi's sweet voice pouring from such ferocious jaws. "What's going on? You didn't mention we'd be turned into _animals!_"

Sora gave her a crooked grin. "Kairi, that's what's so cool about this place! Come on, you're a _lion_! Isn't that awesome?"

Kairi, apparently, did not think so. "How is that awesome?" She toppled over backwards, and after a moment of struggling, resumed her attempts at standing on her hind legs.

"Kairi, that's not going to work. You have to move on all fours," he said gently, padding over behind her and nudging her back so that she fell forward onto all four paws.

"No, I don't, because I'm a human. Just not right now!" She growled, once again attempting to make her way back to the Gummi ship via her hind legs. "I don't understand what you find so great about this world!" She whined. "Or about being animals! I mean, we're hairy, and---" she caught sight of herself in a puddle and screamed, pulling her front paws in front of her stomach protectively. "And I'm _naked!_"

"You're not naked. You've got fur," Riku noted dryly.

Kairi glared at him. "_How is that any __**better**__?!_" She squealed, before toppling over backwards again. Sora shook his head as he walked over to her, attempting to help her up by nudging her back to roll her over.

"Stop being such a party pooper, Kairi. You've even get a tail!" He was quickly swatted away by a very cross Kairi.

"I'm sorry, Sora, but I _really _don't see what's so great about all of this. I've got _paws_, I'm _furry_, I can't _walk_." She glared down at her crimson tail. "And now there's a fifth _appendage_ coming out of nowhere! _Riku,_" She suddenly turned her glare to their silver companion, who had opened his mouth to speak, "Don't. Say. _Anything._" Riku closed his jaws as Kairi's retractable claws made a quick cameo appearance. Her glare didn't leave her face as she finally resigned herself to four-legged transportation and awkwardly padded her way back to the Gummi ship hidden in the rocky area behind them.

Sora watched her go sadly. He'd really been hoping that this would be a fun experience for himself and his friends. He looked back at Riku, who had been tapping his front paw against the ground, a look on his face that was halfway between anxiety and annoyance.

Sora sighed. "She can't hear you, so you might as well say it; I know you're dying to."

Riku smirked before opening his mouth and declaring, "That's what _she _said!"

.fin.

* * *

A/N: So, kinda sucky, I think. But I blame the germs in my system. By the way, FFnet keeps giving me grief when I try to center stuff. Anybody know what to do about that?


	24. 25 Shorties

**A/N: I'M SO SORRY IT'S BEEN SO LONG. **The truth is I've quite run out of ideas for this. I may do one more final chapter, but my brain has, for the time being, run dry. I'm still cranking out fics, but none that really fit the mold for what this collection was meant to be. So here's an update. A collection of drabbles and drabblish pieces. **lots of sokai in this one.**

_I've decided to write a book, by the way. If I got it published, would you read it? To tell me your answer, vote on my profile poll._

**By the way, I freakin' love you people. Just wanted you to know.**

* * *

_Three_

Riku's no less a part of the picture just because Sora and Kairi have started dating.

Sora kisses Kairi, Kairi kisses Sora, and Riku sneaks up behind them and pushes them both off the dock.

_Fool_

Wise men say that fools rush in.

Sora thinks that wise men have never had to make up for lost time.

_Eliminate_

Sora doesn't like the word 'eliminate' anymore, at least not in reference to what he does to the heartless and nobodies that rise in waves before him. 'Eliminate' sounds so permanent, as if he is one-by-one clearing a path to his friends.

The reality is that there is always one more rising to take the place of one that falls.

_Resentment_

Kairi doesn't care if he was Roxas's best friend, he still kidnapped her, and for that she will always maintain her dislike.

Sora can't help but worry that Roxas will always resent her for it.

_Drive_

He's going to run himself ragged trying to get to her, and he's not going to be much good if he's exhausted. He really just needs to take a break, take a potion, take a closer look at the map—

Or at least that's what Donald and Goofy keep saying, but their pleas fall on deaf ears.

_Point_

He babbles for ten minutes and makes no sense at all.

She smiles and laughs and sums it all up in three words.

_Immortal_

He wishes he could live forever, if only so she wouldn't have to worry about losing him.

_Nonchalant_

Everyone seemed to think he'd been so valiant and selfless, giving up his heart for Kairi like that. He doesn't really get it.

It would save Kairi.

He had needed no reason for it beyond that.

_Telephone_

By the time the story circulates the island, he's defeated a horde of demons the size of a world with nothing more than a sharply-filed house key.

_Limitless_

He's quite aware that he's scrawny and silly and really nothing special without the keyblade.

Until she giggles, _"My hero,"_ into his ear.

_Beloved_

She's his…she's his….

…nothing-less-than-all-there-could-never-be-a-word-for.

_Laziness_

His favorite sort of days are those that sound unproductive to anyone but himself and Kairi.

_For the Better_

Kairi had seemed so melancholy when he'd first seen her again. Some of that snark had faded over the year.

But she's warming up again. And he's so thankful. She may have been the one telling him never to change, but God forbid she ever lose that cheek.

_Warmth_

She's warmest on those bright, sunny days when Sora's face keeps her own shielded from the sun.

_Floral_

"Since when did you start wearing perfume?" His mother jokes as she collects his dirty laundry.

Sora smiles. He's going to have to stop letting Kairi steal all his clothes.

_Inability_

Sora has forgiven Riku for a lot of things, but he can't forgive his best friend for being unwilling to forgive himself.

_Monthly_

"I'm telling you, you really, really, _really_ don't want to know. I don't think your male minds could handle it."

"Oh, c'mon, Kairi. We're not going to leave you alone about it, so just tell us already."

"I'm sure we can handle it better than you think. So, what exactly…_happens_?"

By the time Kairi finishes explaining, Sora and Riku wish they'd never asked.

_Moment_

He can't take her on a magic carpet ride.

He can't take her to a ball.

He can't arrange a romantic boat ride through a moonlit lagoon or take her flying through jungle vines. He can't be the kind of Prince Charming all the other Princesses of Heart have.

He can just show up at her door in all his ordinary, unremarkable glory with a small bouquet and a smile, and when she answers the door she smiles at him like he's the most fantastic thing in the universe.

Because to her, that's just what he is.

_Counterpart_

Sometimes he does things that are really, truly ridiculous, and yet he knows he'll get over those the quickest because those are the times that his own not-quite-reflection is laughing at him too.

_Progeny_

Sora just sort of stares. He knows his father isn't really serious, but the declaration had been surprising nonetheless.

"But you like Kairi."

"Yes I do. I think she's a lovely, sweet young lady and good kid."

"Then, why—just last week you were teasing me saying you couldn't wait for us to get married someday!"

"Yes, I did. And yes, of course I want you to marry Kairi one day; I want pretty grandkids."

"Then why do you have a problem with me dating her?"

His father frowns. "Because I don't want pretty grandkids _yet._"

_Nightmare_

It isn't the creeping, crawling, oozing, scratching, snatching darkness that shakes him awake every night. It's the reminder of one simple fact:

They were all people once.

_Temptation_

They're seventeen, and they've reached a crossroads in their relationship. They may not move forward, but there's no going back.

_Measures_

"What would you have done," Riku asks him on one of those rare days when the sky clouds over and they acquiesce to discussing the long-ignored elephant in the room, "if you hadn't gotten the keyblade? What lengths would you have gone to in order to save her?"

Sora's given this question hours upon hours of thought. He'd like to say that he wouldn't have taken Riku's course of action, but with no other alternatives left to him…

"I don't know."

_Empathy_

Best friends are supposed to be supportive. Especially in rather embarrassing instances, like when, for example, the girl of your dreams who you haven't seen in a year walks by in a teeny, tiny, triangle string bikini, which triggers an embarrassing and obvious physical reaction that you _never_ want to happen in public, and since you are at the beach there is nowhere to run or hide and all you really want to do is bury yourself in the sand or at the very least spend a hour under a cold shower while you bang your head against the tile in humiliation. It is at times like this that your best friend ought to say something comforting, like 'Hey, at least nobody else noticed, and at least she didn't notice. _That_ would've been bad.'

But Riku is not that kind of best friend. He's the sort that rolls around on the sand asphixating on his own laughter while you hold your beach bag on your lap frantically trying to find anywhere to look other than Kairi's cleavage.

_Polygons_

Riku has a girlfriend.

They don't know her name, or what she looks like, or even anything about her other than the fact she exists and that Riku is quite keen on keeping her a secret for as long as he can get away with. This shocks Sora and Kairi, who had quite forgotten that the numerous hours in which they marooned their best friend on an island of singledom and spent cozy together might have given Riku adequate rights to go hunt down a significant other of his own.

But now that they are aware of the mystery girl's existence, they are quite interested in meeting her, and discovering why Riku had been so intent upon keeping them in the dark. The two reasons they had come up with are as follows: either Riku was quite ashamed of her, and didn't want his friends to meet her at the risk of scaring them off, or Riku was quite ashamed of them, and didn't want her to meet them at the risk of scaring _her_ off.

They have a horrible feeling it's the latter.

_Passion Fruit_

"You ever wonder if Paopu fruit is an aphrodisiac?"

* * *

**A/N: **Well, do you? Tried to put more Riku in this one. I think the first one, _Three,_ is my favorite. It sums up how I imagine the dynamic of the trio would be when you throw the sokai romance in there.


	25. Never Let Me Go

**A/N: Hello, darlings!** I'm sorry to update with such a short entry after all this time with no update, but there's good news! (...and bad news.) The good news is that I have the next chapter written and will be posting it within the next few days, maybe even tomorrow! The bad news is this: it will be the final chapter. Yep, I've finally decided it is time to end AIWJGTBM. After four years, over 200 reviews, and over 38,000 hits (wut. No, really, WHUT) I've finally decided it's time to end this monster. I've come to this decision for several reasons. The first is that I'm just not getting as many ideas for it as I used to, and therefore there are fewer updates. The other reason, the one that finally convinced me that it was time, is that KH:3D comes out this year (or at least it's supposed to), and as it sets the stage for KH3, it's clear that we will see the trio (or at least the boys) leaving home and setting out on the next adventure, and as my idea with this was to explore life after they return home, I think it's fitting that I end it when we will be seeing them leaving again. I think you'll all like the last chapter, though. I'm rather proud of it. Never fear, because I'll still be writing fic for KH! I'm not going anywhere anytime soon, and even have like five fics lined up to be posted soon! Now, here's the tiny fic, and then I have another announcement to make.

* * *

_Never Let Me Go_

We were holding on. Holding on to each other; our childhood; our innocence; all that we'd lost and all we'd been foolish enough to throw away. We were holding tight but our hands were slipping through each other's fingers like the sands in the hourglass, counting down to when fate called on us again. We can't hold on forever; not to each other, not to friendship or budding romance; not to sandcastles and rafts and chalkscribble promises; no matter how much we want to. At the end of the day, it's not up to us. But we were thrown together for a reason. Fate needs us together, so no matter how frequently or far it separates us, it will always eventually need us together again.

And that's something we can hold on to.

* * *

**Announcement time! **So I want to do something nice for all of my lovely readers/reviewers/subscribers/etc. I was thinking of making a video blog to thank all of you for existing, as well as maybe answer some questions, and/or read some excerpts of your favorite fics of mine. I don't know if anyone would actually be interested in seeing me do this, so please let me know what you think, and if you have any questions you'd like me to answer in the vlog, or fics you'd like to hear me read from (they can be any of mine from any fandom), please let me know in a review or PM asap. Sorry for writing more author's notes than fic. OTL


	26. As if We'd Just Gone to Buy Milk

__**A/N:** And here it is. The final chapter of this series. I was going to post it just a day or so after the last chapter, but I got all sentimental and couldn't bring myself to do it. It feels weird to finally be finishing this off, but I'm glad I'm doing it. I'm very happy with this chapter, as it sums up the idea behind this whole series, as well as what the title means.

I just want to give a huge eternal thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, alerted, faved, etc this story over the years. Seriously. You make my life like you wouldn't believe. As I mentioned earlier, I'm planning on doing a video blog to sort of personally say thanks, and I need you guys to send me questions/fics you'd like me to read from, etc for it. I love you all, really. If I could dive through my computer screen and hug you all, I would. These two words aren't nearly enough, but here they are: thank you. And now, without further ado, I give you the final update to AIWJGTBM.

_As if We'd Just Gone to Buy Milk_

Look up.

There's the night sky, glittering and twinkling with millions upon millions of stars. See that one? Over there? No, a little to the left. That one, the small bright one. Yes, that one. It's not a star. It's a world.

Look closer.

Such a small world, nestled in a calm, serene part of space. Too far from its neighbors to know it has any. How would it know? It's all water and oceans, you say?

Look closer.

Islands. Small speckles of land sprinkled atop the seas. Small islands with small villages of small people with big hearts.

Look closer.

One island in particular. Too small for homes and businesses, but just right for playhouses and summer fun. Children run across it and dream of worlds beyond the small one they inhabit. It is such a small, inconsequential place. Nothing really special in the grand scheme of things. Beautiful? Yes. Remarkable? Not really.

Now look closer.

There's a small outlet of land just off the side of this island where a long curved tree grows. It's odd, this tree; no one really knows how it grew so warped as to be such a perfect bench for the children who play there. But it is not the most remarkable thing on this small island.

Look closer.

Three children sit on the tree, except they're not children, not really. Their souls are far too old for their bodies and they have seen horrors no child should see.

Rewind.

The same three children (except now they really are still children) sit on the same tree on the same island on the same small world nestled in the same unimportant corner of the cosmos. They are younger, sillier, more carefree, more naïve.

Fast forward.

Stop.

No one sits on the tree. The children are all off, scattered across the worlds. Fighting monsters and demons and their own darkness and fears. They hop from world to world and leave another piece of innocence behind at each.

Fast forward.

Stop.

Play.

Back to the present, where the three not-quite children who are still too young to really be adults sit on the warped tree and watch the sun set on their small world. They're back where they belong, a little older, a little taller, a little wiser. The bonds of friendship grown stronger, the budding romance ready to bloom, the horizons much wider. They sit there as if they never really left, as if they'd just gone to buy milk. As if nothing much had changed.

Except everything has changed.

Look closer.

Look at the boy with the wild hair and eyes like the sky at midday. Look past the goofy smile and bright eyes. This boy saw horrors. He watched his everything—his home, his friends—ripped apart. He was given a weapon and sent off to save it all. And he did. He saved everything. The lazy carefree boy carried the weight of the whole universe.

Look at the boy with the cold green eyes hiding behind long bangs. Look at how he smiles and laughs with his friends. Would you believe he tried to kill them? He has fought darkness and been darkness and known guilt and regret and sin and redemption. Don't let his detached attitude fool you; he holds everything so much closer because he once threw it all away.

Now look at the girl sitting between them. She smiles and giggles and swats at her silly boys as if they drive her insane. But she has done more than her fair share of worrying about them. She has stood, alone, waiting for too long a time. She has watched, and wondered, and feared the worst and felt so helpless for being unable to help them. She has thrown away caution and thrown herself through dark walls to be able to sit and let her silly boys work her nerves.

Zoom out.

See it now? How hard they laugh, how much they act like old times? It's not because nothing has changed. It's because everything has changed.

Peak ahead. Just a tad. Just the next page.

The tree is empty.

They leave tomorrow. Duty calls, and they must answer. And then, once it's all over, when they come back (if they come back) they will sit on this tree and talk and laugh and love one another just as fiercely as before. Until you look closer, and see that they sit there older, wiser, and so much more battered and broken. They'll return with battle scars, some visible and some not; hearts stronger but stretched further. They'll hold more tightly to each other with each attempt to tear them apart, and each homecoming will be that much sweeter with each greater distance traveled.

Life may go on, but beneath the normality there is the undercurrent stained by adventure and trauma.

Life goes on, seemingly ever the same, but it isn't really, because no one comes home from war the same as if they'd just gone to buy milk.

-fin-


End file.
